Non-Political Ranting: Unleash Your Anger ITT

Your employer hands out free hemorrhoid creme? Thats a little on the nose.

It doesn’t go on your nose, stupid.

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https://proxybay.github.io

When I was a freshman I had a meal plan at the dorm across the street. One Sunday a month they would serve Chinese food and call it Chinese Harvest Festival or some bullshit. Well, that’s fine. If I can eat all the other crappy food I can eat crappy Chinese food. Well, one month I opened my fortune cookie at the end of the meal, and the fortune read, I shit you not “Can you name the four food groups?” So I’m like “WTF??!!! YOU CALL THAT A FORTUNE?1!?1!1! THAT’S NOT A FUCKING FORTUNE!!1!1!11 THAT’S A GODDAMNED QUIZ FOR A FIRST GRADER1!11!11!!”

You can see I’m still a little angry.

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When I was a teenage paperboy back in the 70s, I had a Chinese-American customer give me a large box of fortune cookies for a Christmas present.

I assumed that they owned a restaurant.

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My favorite fortune cookie I’ve ever opened was “ignorance is bliss. you must be happy”

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I was with my wife and got one that said “Every exit is an entrance to new experiences”.

My favorite one though is one that my then boss got that said “Made in the USA”.

lol that had to lead to an anal joke, right?!

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Why does fucking EVERYTHING require making an account now?

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I spent 15 minutes setting up a HP account to connect to my printer.

When I finally did. It tells me that I can only print PDzf through the HP app. Everything else needs to go direct.

Wtf.

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The goddamn music during Chik-Fil-A commercials has reawakened my near-supernatural ability to find the remote and mute the television in under 4 tenths of a second

People making zero effort to pronounce non western names.

Just sat in a board meeting where the chair introduced a new board member, a Sri Lankan woman, and made zero effort to get it right.

Like. How much fucking contempt does it show not to even try and learn this in advance.

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I frequently have to verbalize lists of names cold. Not for a corporate board, but I have sympathy.

British soccer commentators are the absolute worst at this. American commentators have pronunciation guides, etc. British commentators just go by vibes and do horrific things to peoples names and give zero fucks about it. Probably the colonial attitude

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Really? Guess I haven’t noticed it… and I love Ian Darke.

Poooolisicchhh

Darke is GOATed, definitely doesn’t apply to him

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The most impressive thing I’ve seen at my job is the graduation ceremony. There’s an individual (the provost maybe?) who reads the name of every graduating student as they walk to the stage to get their diploma, where these students are from dozens of different countries with names that appear unpronounceable to me, and she just crushes it. She reads every one like she’s known them for years. It’s absolutely amazing.

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She might be a name whisperer. Theres a woman who does this for graduations in Australia.

I attended my wife’s graduation. Her and her friends were super stressed that they would mess it up. The woman nailed it. Like chinese, thai, vietnamese, Arabic, spanish, etc. All flawless

NEVER AGAIN will I let someone have room to turn right when making a tough left that isn’t a turn lane.

The considerate move is always sit back a little when you have room to turn right if you get there after the car turning left. After they go, then you can position however.

NOBODY ever does this. I do it every time. Game over assholes. Not sure why I thought the same species than can’t master the dark art of turn signaling would get this one right.

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