Does anyone itt know CanadaMatt irl, and if so can you reach out to him to make sure he is ok? His post in the LC thread has me legitimately worried and upset.
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Agreed. I hope he is okay. I know he has been going through a lot. I am concerned.
I feel really bad as I was dealing with my own life that I missed CanadaMatt’s posts. Has anyone heard from him?
@CanadaMatt3004 I hope you are doing okay. Know there are people here willing to listen. Please reach out.
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Anybody have experience with Somatic Meditation? There should be a warning on that stuff. I was looking for some guided meditations on youtube and found a somatic guided meditation so I did that last night, and it is intense. I looked into the science of how it works afterward and no wonder. The idea that Im connecting nervous system damage to touch and safety was a lot all at once. I feel good this morning though
This went way different than I was expecting.
My psychiatrist recently asked if I’d be open to ketamine treatment for my depression. How have things been a couple months out?
How is somatic meditation different from other meditation practices?
Its specifically based around the idea of communicating with your body instead of your mind. So it takes a lot of grounding concepts and has you associate them with the feelings of your actual body. So you feel those physical feelings more intensely when you are meditating. The specific one I worked on was associating the act of breathing in a specific way with the feeling of safety. So by practicing that on a regular basis, now when my nervous system is overehelmed, I can breathe in that way and it conveys that feeling of safety directly without having to envision that safety in my mind.
Its pretty fascinating. I thought it might be mumbo jumbo but I looked into it and there is compelling brainwave evidence that shows an actual rewiring of the way somebody perceives threats when they practice somatic meditation.
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This sounds pretty similar to what a lot of meditation practices teach. It can be pretty life-changing for some people.
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I think that much of it may not be any more complicated than “just try to focus on your breathing, and if your mind starts to wander, just gently come back to focusing solely on your breathing.”
The difference ive found with somatic therapy is that the focus isnt on the mind, but on the grounding. In most meditation sessions, the first thing you establish is your literal grounding points, where your body connects with the solid thing holding you to the ground. Start by feeling and acknowledging that your feet are on a solid surface, that the back of the chair is securing you, that your knees are making contect with the legs of the couch which are on solid ground.
By starting off in the body and not the mind, you train your emotional responses to bypass the brain entirely and instead focus on the physicsl feelings that the emotions are giving you. Its what for me personally made somatics so powerful for me. Possibly for the first time, I really focused on the physical aspects of my trauma and grief instead of rationalizing them intellectually. I allowed my thoughts to go literally to the place that I was storing that grief (For me, most of it occured in the gut, and since I started working on this the stress based acid reflux I was having has essentially vanished.) And release that pain and tension through breath.
It likely wont work for everyone, most therapy is not one size fits all, but for me personally after breaking me down the first couple times its been incredibly helpful.
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Below is a limited time guest pass to try Calm, free for 30 days. https://www.calm.com/gp/EL6FP47LEF4PY7XYYN
I don’t know what resources that you’re using, but I really enjoy the 10-minute “Daily Calm” meditations narrated by Tamara Levett on the Calm app I linked above. In addition to a lot of different meditation/relaxation exercises, they also have a catalog of nature sounds, relaxing music, and soothing spoken stories to lull one to sleep.
I have a monthly subscription free through my health insurance carrier, and it really helped me manage my anxiety last year when I was dealing with the diagnoses and symptoms of A-Fib, sleep apnea and prostate cancer.
I don’t know about somatic meditation specifically but a lot of this sounds very similar to what many meditation practices try to do.
Lots of meditations start by focusing on the breathing and then shift attention to body sensations. Doesn’t matter if you call it somatic or body scan or insight, it’s all similar. But I see nothing wrong with calling it somatic
I still swear ketamine therapy has been a real life changer for me. I had a total of four treatments, and each one left me feeling more confident and mentally stronger.
I have diagnoses of complex PTSD and major depressive disorder with anxiety. Before ketamine, I lived with major hypervigilance, fear, anxiety, abandonment issues, chronic sadness, and this constant feeling that everything was my fault and that I was never good enough. I was always thinking about other people: What do you want from me?
It was no way to live. Yet, being the only breadwinner in my relationship, I got up every day (if I even slept) and went to work. I did what I needed to do simply because I had to. Inside, though, all I wanted to do was fall apart, crawl into a hole and sleep, or just hide from the entire world. No one, not even my husband, really knew or understood the amount of pain I was in.
It is incredibly hard to explain what a ketamine session is like, and I think the experience is very individual. For me, the intention I set going into each session also mattered a lot.
But the bottom line is that about 90 minutes after my first treatment, I felt like a different person. My hypervigilance was probably 90% gone. I felt lighter. I remember feeling like I was having the best day of my entire life.
And yes, for me, those effects lasted.
I did notice them starting to wear off somewhat after about two weeks, just before my second treatment. The next treatment felt almost like a booster, and the subsequent treatments built on that. My treatments were initially two weeks apart and then spaced farther apart. My last treatment was June 24, so I am now two months out.
I am not 100%, but I would easily say I am 94%. The biggest difference is how I handle difficult things when they happen. I can deal with them much more logically and calmly. I can step back and look at situations rationally instead of immediately reacting from fear, anxiety, hypervigilance, or abandonment. I feel like I can see things through a completely different set of eyes.
Life still happens. I still have bad days and difficult emotions. Ketamine didn’t make me immune to those things. What it seems to have changed is my ability to cope with them without being consumed by them.
My psychiatrist told me that I will know if and when I need another booster. Some people may need one after a few months, some much later, and some may not need one again. What I really appreciated was that there was no pressure to keep booking treatments.
He also told me not to interpret a couple of bad days as meaning I immediately need another treatment. You still have to deal with life and use the tools you have. His advice was essentially that if things become persistently bad again, I’m genuinely struggling to cope despite trying to manage them, and I continue going downhill, I’ll recognize that it may be time to come back.
So, two months after my last treatment: yes, I still consider ketamine therapy life-changing for me. I can’t say what someone else’s experience will be, but I would make the same decision again without hesitation.
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Really happy to hear you are doing well and feeling better, thank you for sharing your experience with us 
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I’ve been fairly lucky with medication.
Many people with BP or other mental illnesses struggle for years to get the right medication, side effects etc.
I got out onto something, it worked well, dose was about right
Entirely through my own fault, the last two weeks were a disaster.
I get my meds in Australia. I was told by my doctor that the meds available in the Philippines are identical, and it won’t be a problem, even though they are slightly different formulations and delivery mechanism.
I ran out of my Aussie meds and was using the local version for nearly two weeks.
Absolutely horrible. Felt significantly stronger. Spent the last two weeks in a sedated daze. Was definitely stupid. Fortunately I had an Australia trip already planned, so was able to get the original meds again.
Took a few days to stabilise, but feel like today I’ve come out of a fog.
Horrible.
I do not envy everyone who struggles for years with this.
On a side note. I have increased sympathy for stupid people. It is hard to go through life when you can’t easily put complicated things together, draw conclusions quickly, or read and understand text easily.
It was hard for two weeks. Imagine being stupid for your whole life
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So, an update on me.
As expected, the effects of the ketamine seem to be slowly wearing off. My hypervigilance is increasing, as is my hyperfixation on my husband’s affair. Naturally, this is causing me some grief.
My husband has been excellent about doing everything he can to reassure and comfort me. It definitely helps, but the relief doesn’t last nearly as long as it did following the ketamine treatments.
My biggest problem right now is the damn cost. It’s $750 per treatment, and unfortunately, I just don’t have the funds available at the moment. I should in a couple of weeks.
It is such a shame that this treatment is so expensive, especially considering how effective it has been for me. I can’t help thinking about how many people might benefit from it but simply cannot afford it. And I’m in Canada, where we have publicly funded healthcare, yet I still have to pay this much out of pocket. It’s incredibly frustrating.
I’m not doing terribly or anything. I’m still managing, and I’m certainly nowhere near where I was before starting treatment. But I can recognize that some of my old patterns are returning, and I would rather address them before they become overwhelming.
Anyway, I thought I’d provide an update, both the good and the not-so-good. I still consider ketamine therapy one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. I just wish it was much more affordable and easier to access.
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Good luck DF, Are you guys in couples therapy together? The affair my eifr had essentially broke our marriage. We’re friends and roommates but ive dropped any romantic attachment I had to her. I spent three months out of the house working on myself, learning to be alone. Its been a surprisingly positive experience after the initial immense grief.
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