Uoure excited for the wrong thing man.
Hello free copy of The Replacements.
Wife and I watched the new Roadhouse yesterday (with the clear intent of MST3King the hell out of it.)
Holy mother, what an awful movie (that is AT LEAST 30 minutes too long.) Not only is nothing, ever, explained about why a random island in the Florida Keys is overrun with biker gangs, but the inciting action that kicks of Daltonâs revenge plot pussies out on actually killing who needs to die, and the bad guys never succesfully kill anyone of import, and the last 30-45 minutes are spent with the movie asking us to be on the side of a legit psychopathic murderer.
And oh yeah, a major setpiece of the climax is out at sea for some fucking reason. Isnt this supposed to be about a bar in rural Missouri?
Seriously, one of the points of the film is that Dalton cannot control his rage once it kicks off. He is a psychopath who murdered a friend of his in a UFC cage because the guy dared to try to beat him. This is the hero of the story.
Also, no throat ripping? The final blow is just a series of stabbings?
The original isnt good, but this is fucking atrocious, and Gyllenhall has roughly the charisma of the gum on the bottom of Swayzeâs shoe.
F - - -. How on Earth this has a 61 on RT is beyond me. Id rather watch The Dark Tower both as a movie and as a movie to rip on.
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Take this back. It was an annual favorite amongst my older boys. Probably have seen it 20+ times.
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I liked watching the Ernest movies when I was a kid. My dad always liked them too. Fired it up a few Christmases ago when visiting my folks at the holidays, andâŚwoof. Brutally unfunny.
Jim Varneyâs voice acting of the slinky dog in Toy Story is probably all the value his work will provide to me going forward.
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Theres a reason we are only seeing them from the back
I just like seeing Martin Lawrence get some work. Where has he been?
Err, The Fugitive is also selling for $0.00?
F you
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Tough but fair.
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Ok fine, the original isnt good, but its enjoyable.
Comeon, its not a good movie, full stop
They put a highly charismatic star in a sandbox and gave him the appropriate tools and setting to create one of the more memorable popcorn movies of the 80s.
Itâs very obviously not high art, but itâs good.
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SPOILER ALERT
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Same. The three best Ernest movies imo are Saves Xmas, Goes to Camp, and Goes to Jail.
Ernest Goes to Camp was problematic though for a weird reason. The Chief was played by Iron Eyes Cody, an Italian man well known to be impersonating a person of First Nation lineage without actually being a Native American.
Heâs the guy who played a Native American shedding a tear about pollution in one of the countryâs most well-known television public service announcements from the group Keep America Beautiful.
THEM! (1954)
You know Godzilla is my boy, but Iâm always ready to watch an all-American kaiju movie, Them! is maybe the Citizen Kane of these, coming out the same year as Godzilla did. Production values and visual effects here are way better than you might expect. This movie goes kinda hard: flamethrower and bazookas, the giant ants look fantastic. Iâm certain a young James Cameron loved this movie, Iâm noticing all kinds of similarities with the Aliens movies. Easy recommend for anyone who likes old-timey 50âs sci-fi. Insert your own pronoun joke here.
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Kinda remember this from the giant ants.
What was the one with the fire ant hordes?
TNT has been showing all the Kong and Godzilla movies leading up to the theater thing,
Skull Island is pretty fun. Iâve watched it a few times and enjoyed it every time.
The rest are just pure nonsense. I canât do it. Oh look we built this giant thing for no reason and it immediately escaped our containment. Oh no!
I think Godzilla Minus One is the only modern Godzilla movie I could even watch. Cloverfield destroys all of them except GMO.
The Jack Black Kong movie was ok. I havenât seen that on TNT though.
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The technical term is âLow Comedyâ as opposed to other comedies that are more âHigh Brow.â You donât have a lot of subtlety or jokes you have to think about; Cameron Diaz scooping some jiz out of Ben Stillerâs hair and using it as conditioner in her own hair doesnât need a lot of explainingâŚ
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Shut your cigarette empty mouth!
It probably doesnât hold up, but it was a fun ride in the theater back in the day before there was more content available than could ever be watched. The only downside was it was hard to sit through the whole thing if you smoked because they lit up cigarettes every fucking scene. 5 ripped throats out of 5.
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