I feel like every single event in my life led up to that moment and my life is never gonna be the same for having experienced it, it was that awesome
I’m a changed man. I’m even standing up to my boss now. I’m done tolerating bullshit, manipulation, and anything else in my life that I don’t like. It’s a new era.
X ray image of my bad (worse) knee I had surgery on 8 years ago. I went back to the same surgeon today. You can see in the image the screws and then a big chunk of bone floating underneath it. That’s not supposed to be there.
He’s worried about the soft tissue as well because he says the space between the bones looks small. I’m getting CT/MRI and scheduling surgery asap in case I do more damage to it. He said a knee replacement with the kind of damage he suspects I have is probably on the table in 10-15 years, so this reconstructive surgery he’s thinking about will be an attempt to delay that as long as possible.
Shitty news. I don’t like being a cripple at 32 but we can’t choose our health sometimes. I probably let this go a little too long.
I didnt even tell him about my right knee, it’s hurting pretty bad too. My dad had both knees replaced by the age of 45 so I guess it’s not too surprising.
That sounds like a crazy situation, not sure if you’re discussing here but do you feel like they had bad intentions?
yes and no, hard to tell. it’s really really painful either way. hard to put blame on anyone but myself here. i willingly entered it.
This shit is wild man. I never would have that this would be the path the BBBS program would take you down. Sorry to hear you are going through some stuff. So you have no equity in the house you fully bought? Have you talked to a lawyer?
respectfully disagree, i think it was probably fairly predictable i’d fuck it up in an epic fashion
technically I have 1%. When I confronted the mom about it (the sis genuinely had no idea - she got a lot of credit from me for this. she started an actual argument about it w/ her mom that I probably was not supposed to overhear but I did) she tried to act like I wasn’t even entitled to the 1%. LOL she is in for a big surprise if she thinks I’m not gonna want that whenever this resolves.
I do not currently pay the mortgage at all or any of the downpayment - I’ve not really paid a dime. However, this is my credit line, it’s massive, and I’m basically hamstrung from buying anything until they get me off title or my income triples.
lawyers have told me that I probably have some case here and some fraud may have been committed but it’s gonna be big big bucks to pursue this i think and I’m waiting to see if they fulfill their promises before pursuing anything. I did inform them that if they didn’t fulfill their end of the bargain I would have to pursue legal action.
i’m exhausted and sick though, and i dont know if i have the energy for this, so I’m just hoping they refinance and I can forget about this forever.
but hey, i was right about the sister liking me at least
Doesn’t sound that bad to me, immediately had equity equal to the downpayment at close. They should want to clarify that is their money and not yours.
of course, it just was never communicated to me (and in fact I’m pretty sure the opposite was communicated) so it was a massive shock when I saw it.
being on the hook for 100% of the loan but owning pretty much none of the house is such a shit situation for me I’m surprised they just expected it without discussing it at all. like they can just stop paying it (theyve already made a few late payments) and wtf can I do really?
given the fact they’ve done 0% of the stuff they promised so far i gotta kinda look at it as the data point it is. my fault, of course, but it is relevant for me goin forward
prefer to talk about this on my other place but its ok til i disappear here. i dont know how any of this shit works. i was overwhelmed w work when this was happening. rolling out the biggest project of my career to date. my one condition was I didnt want to deal with any bs at all. from what I can understand I’m the primary borrower . sis is the co-signer, which does offer me a little protection, but the consequences of her credit bein destroyed at 23 are far less than my situation - and i fully believe the mom would be willing to wreck her daughter’s credit.
on the title is mom, me, sister. mom has 84%, sis has 15%, I have 1%.
oh yea extra fucking worse is the sis is a licensed notary, so if they were up to shenanigans i may be really really really giga fucked
I think you are good. If they stop paying then bank seizes the house, probably sells it at a discount and their downpayment goes poof.
Looks like they can’t come after you personally for any deficit in California:
Obviously it would wreck your credit score but talking a shitty situation rather than a life crippling decision, worst case scenario.
i hav spent like 12 years building my credit and this was like, death spiral unacceptable situation for me (credit being ruined) but I have come to the point where i no longer care
if they became unable to make payments I thought I’d offer to buy some % of the house and take those over. hasnt happened yet, play is kind of on them atm
Would really strongly recommend not doing that (or thinking real hard about it and talking to a lawyer). The one thing you have going for you in this situation now is that you’re not out any money out-of-pocket.
i believe the sis’s exact words after the purchase were:
“now that we own a house together, we gonna go out for drinks or what?”
I mean yeah, credit is important but they have way more to lose than you do in the cash they put into the downpayment. They aren’t going to walk away unless they have no other choice and certainly are in no position to try to pressure you to into making payments on their behalf or do anything else improper.
i dont think they’d do anything like that. the worst case scenario for me is they keep making payments forever and dont get me off the loan.
So then while the situation is obviously highly unusual doesn’t seem like anything nefarious was done nor particularly life altering.
For your own sake, I wouldn’t have nasty feelings until they actually f you. If you were sincerely like, “look, I really want/need to buy a house of my own in the near future and can’t do until you get me off the loan. Are you really doing everything you can to get my off?” and they blew you off. Then I’d start getting nasty.
that was almost the exact convo we had a few weeks ago and I was told 45 days. i already found an internet bill in my name though that I definitely didnt open myself so i’m not feeling super trusty of them.
