You’re the global dictator, now fix climate change

The climate change discussion gets bogged down in the hypothetical and abstract so often.

ITT you are the dictator of the world, which means all political impediment to your desired solutions are moot. You can literally do anything but you are also responsible for all externalities.

Explain your idea, but also anticipate the externalities and how you might mitigate those.

Mine would be the creation of a global research agency with two main focusses; carbon capture and green energy.

This would be incredibly expensive but I would mitigate costs by diverting all of the worlds weapons research into this task. The people who work in weapons research would be retrained to work for this agency.

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Put in a 200 dollar a ton carbon tax which is immediately distributed as UBI that phases in over 5 years. Pay 40 dollars a ton for captured carbon (only payable on wood delivered to our carbon sequestration landfills).

Pump 100B a year into research on nuclear power and when the safety/disposal issues are resolved subsidize costs by 50% for 15 years on new construction/implementation.

Nationalize every company that significantly funded climate denial propaganda and use the proceeds to subsidize green initiatives.

Give Saudi Arabia the same sanctions that North Korea has and watch them return to tents in the desert.


Need to go full scifi and move all industry and power plants into orbit/the moon

Dissolve national governments and land borders, the biggest obstacles to mitigating climate change, creating (where they don’t exist) local government.

Raise money by taxing the fuck out of areas with large GDPs and Amazon, Google, Facebook etc.

Use it to fund research centres in the US, Europe and Asia, attracting top scientists in related fields and also investment in education and health programmes in Africa and other impoverished areas. Embezzlement by local leaders will be met with harsh sentences - no way am I creating millionaires/billionaires there.

Seize and decommission all nuclear and chemical weapons and ban development of any more.

Top of my head.

  • Steep carbon tax, permanent
  • Extra bounty on air-captured carbon, variable based on current CO2 concentration.
  • Turn over mass transit development to best experts from Europe/Japan
  • Eliminate all development restrictions within walking distance of transit.
  • Subsidize research and deployment of zero-carbon power generation, storage, and transportation options.
  • Extend operations for all existing nuclear facilities.
  • Research emergency geoengineering plans in case needed to prevent some kind of disastrous feedback loop.

This is only interesting if we talk externalities as well.

Only the elites can have cars and air conditioners.

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Put on a sweater


Oil company executives. Guillotines. j/k. Maybe.

I’d establish a wartime economy with rationing to reduce use of resources and use conscripted military to put down any revolts.

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Stop the defenestration of forests and start planning where to grow more trees.

I would probably golf a lot, grab everybody by the pussy, and eat a lot of Big Macs. Then plan the rest of my strategy based on whatever the opposite of what Obama would do is.


Clean coal. Very, very clean.


Start a new coronavirus and see what happens.

Exhaust pipes for cows.

Or cowtalytic converters.


Stop production of internal combustion engines except for critical infrastructure and construction. Take older out of service as replaced.

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Make everywhere bike friendly. Legislate extreme laws where everyone else has to give way to cyclists and any accident is always the motorists fault.

This is fun! I almost want to start a similar thread on 2p2 to piss people off. Almost.


no cars, like zero for any purposes /anyone
massive restriction of air-transportation
expand public transportation
make overconsumption criminally punishable
Money into research in two directions (renewable energies, nuclear power)

edit forgot a couple:
caught non-recycling -> 20 years in jail
working in a plant, that is an environmental pig, in any capacity, -> 20 years in jail

Nothing that can be reasonably described as a “forest” can be defenestrated.

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I think “defenestrated” has to do with windows. Or?
I think jf meant deforested.