Sir, that would be most unsportsmanlike.
Ok. I’ll leave it to the eagle to know how best to use the available energy. Point is, he’s got plenty to work with. If he wanted to go kamikaze, a direct hit to your head would likely kill you both. Match ends in a draw.
Against an elephant I think I try to get and stay behind it. As it spins to face me, maybe it gets dizzy and loses it’s balance. Can’t kill it even if it falls but at least I don’t get immediately squashed.
This is pretty lol. Unless they have an absolutely ridiculous definition of well-trained. Anyone who can bench half of that (raw) is well-trained by any reasonable standard.
Lol I think they meant record human lift vs record gorilla lift.
“What do I bench? Oh, I’m not very well-trained at all, so only about 700lbs or so. With my penis.”
You know how people were thinking that the silver lining to COVID is that it might lead to the development of new technologies. I assume most were thinking of vaccines. But apparently that is not all:
My favorite bit:
Congratulations Mr & Mrs Crunchy 
When I first moved to south Florida I was attacked by a mocking bird while I was walking to meet some coworkers for a drink. I did not fare as well as I would have guessed before hand. Don’t underestimate the advantage of a small creature that is pissed off. Also, mocking birds are fucking assholes.
QFT. A group of crows is called a murder ffs.
My brother taught me that when I was 11 and he was 9.
At the end of that Bill Murray video, my next video suggestion is Sapolski’s lecture on depression (tres apropos, algorithm).
Murray has some good insights, as I hadn’t adequately considered the impact of terrain. Eagle catches me in the open, I think I’m done. Forest or rocky area, different story. The concept is well illustrated, for instance, by the writer of the Kirk v Gorn STOS ep, who clearly appreciated this important strategic idea.
There was a seagulls nest above a house here and everytime the owners went in or out the Gull attacked 
I posted it in a thread here a few months ago, definitely this year and it’s a tweet with the young man telling us not to mess with even these smallish birds, there mental. 
https://mobile.twitter.com/carlacallaghan/status/1393532716478607364
Can’t wait tbh, my favourite place for a Italian takeaway…
So I fancied a Pizza tonight but still don’t want to go out for one & heard about a nice combination of topping that ill try later on my frozen Good fellas Pepperoni & add on Jalapeño/Pineapple.
I have been told its a winner, let you all know later. 
Can’t find my original post (it was in the previous LC thread) but figured I’d post a late update to my gym attire search: I got the shirt in the mail and it was, uh, less subtle than I imagined
Idk if I’ll actually wear it to the gym as I’m not usually a fan of logos this big, but maybe
LOLOL at anyone who thinks they’d rather take on a chimp than a wolf or a kangaroo.
One of the animals grabbed him in a bear hug before chomping into the bone above his right eyebrow. He then stuck his finger in St. James’s right eye, gouging it out. The same animal clamped his teeth onto St. James’s nose, biting it off, as the other chimp chewed away at St. James’s fingers. In the melee, one of the chimps dug in his claws and ripped the skin off the right side of St. James’s face, causing it to flop over and cover his left eye, temporarily blinding him. One of the primates sunk his teeth into St. James’s skull. He then closed his jaws on St. James’s mouth, ripping off his lips and most of his teeth. St. James tried to put one of his hands down the animal’s throat, but the chimp just kept chewing on it and chewing on it, and he couldn’t get it out.
St. James fell to the ground, no longer able to defend himself, and for at least five minutes, the mauling continued as he lay helpless. One of the chimps gnawed on his buttocks and bit off his genitals. They ravaged his left foot, leaving it shredded. Blood poured from his body, and LaDonna was screaming. It looked as if they were eating him alive. Finally, LaDonna’s screams drew the owners’ son-in-law, Mark Carruthers, who came running armed with a .45-caliber revolver. After struggling to find a clean shot, he opened fire on the younger primate. The shot had no apparent effect,
The emergency crew described Nash’s injuries as “horrendous”.[17] Within the following 72 hours, Nash underwent more than seven hours of surgery on her face and hands by four teams of surgeons. The hospital provided counseling to its staff members who initially treated her because of the extraordinary nature of Nash’s wounds.[24] Paramedics noted she lost her hands, nose, eyes, lips, and mid-face bone structure, and received significant brain tissue injuries.[25] Doctors reattached her jaw, but announced on April 7, 2009, that Nash would be blind for life. Her injuries made her a possible candidate for an experimental face transplant surgery.[24]
These things are smart. A bear would never think to gouge out your eye right off the bat. A wolf has one weapon. You can’t climb a tree to get away from a chimp. They can open doors and smash windows. You are fucked.
That first story might be the most horrific thing I’ve ever read.
I’m glad I didn’t TLDR it. Until we get to the attack I just assumed it was Moe who did it, which would have made it even more tragic.
Yeah in my memory it was the owner’s chimp who freaked out and attacked him. Poor Moe.
We had one of those. I don’t think it was a tiger though. Maybe a cow. In any event, stale ass pepper coming out of those things is flavorless.
Jump on the ostrich’s back and strangle it from behind too. Easy game.
