STOP THE COUNT!
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Moist
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I don’t like the idea of censoring it. Should be something that is handled on a case by case basis.
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Don’t understand censoring the word with asterisks. We know what it is by context.
If you’re going to censor it, replace it with something funny. Like what SNL did on The Joe Pesci Show.
OK 3 words.
(other word is 3 letter f word obv)
I think that in addition to being moderated when used it a sexist way, it should also not be allowed as an attack on any poster as that seems way too likely to create drama.
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I voted casual vulgarity because it feels like the right answer but I also don’t have much skin in the game. So in that case, I would just go for what the women want if they have a strong opinion as a group. If we ban c-word for misogyny then I think bitch, pussy, and possibly some others have to go too, because it feels exactly the same to me other than the (American) perceived level of vulgarity. It would also imply that JMo would never be welcome here.
I think it should be moderated - “whinging” is a shit word, and I say that as a UK’er.
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Do you think this generalizes to the three letter f-word, or if not, why not?
Two things that I think are definitely D.O.A. are
(1) a poster’s nationality mattering. That seems dumb.
(2) that the target of the offensive term matters. I can’t call Mitt Romney a n***** and be like “but he’s white so it’s totally not racist!”, so in the same manner I don’t think calling him a c*** works either.
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I see the NVG analogists made it all the way over here.
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lucille bluth’s yacht
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I don’t think this was exactly your point so not saying we are in disagreement, just adding that the size does not matter to me. I’m concerned about my family, friends, and community. I just can’t attend to the one person who might exist that’s hurt or offended by my use of the phrase “garbage juice.” I’m not a mind reader. I don’t even know if that person is real.
But if that phrase hurt or offended someone at Unstuck? It doesn’t even have to be more than one person or someone I like. Let them speak up and I will listen to what they’re experiencing.
The Brits speaking up is one corollary example. I’m as eager to be sensitive to the stuff that riles them up yet makes zero sense to me as a trigger. I don’t have to agree or understand with someone else’s boundaries to show respect and kindness toward that boundary.
I choose to not use the C-word just within Unstuck for the benefit of a few people it hurts. Getting roped into “yes but is it objectively offensive” is an entirely different conversation than “will you stop hurting me with your choice of language.”
We will endlessly debate the former and do so gladly, but be clear if that’s the conversation you want to have. Using that as the basis for whether to get someone to stop saying the word is not productive and plays into the unhealthy dynamic that we are only allowed boundaries if we can justify them.
That’s madness and quite frankly abusive to others and ourselves. People who require you to justify a boundary before they respect it are dangerous. Consent does not guide their behavior. But we reinforce that same mentality in ourselves if we require ourselves and others to justify a boundary before we believe it is a worthy boundary.
If someone says “stop, your choice of words hurts me,” a person then deflecting to “yes but is it objectively offensive” is the same as saying “I will continue punching you in the face until you can prove to me it’s objectively wrong.”
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Please flesh out this line of reasoning for us then.
Is that plot point from Love, Actually about Brits caring about a competition for the top Christmas song actually a real thing?
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Why?
I’d suggest:
• Strongly discouraged when addressing a poster. It should be case-by-case, but we all know what’s what and you shouldn’t be surprised or inclined to moan if you call a poster a ■■■■ and something happens because of it. It may not be uniformly sexist, contra some ITT, but that doesn’t make it good posting.
• Aimed at public figures, I think it should be tolerated where it doesn’t clearly have sexist overtones.
• It should always be next Tuesday in the UK politics thread. The generally strong discouragement of aiming it at another poster is a concession to the word’s sense and connotation in American patois. Carving out the UK thread seems reasonable and we should be able to fling it about to our ■■■■■■ heartent in that thread.
So who’s coming up with a better word to describe these two?
Let’s just be sure we think everything through nefore we make any rash decisions.
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I could do so by analogy, since that appears to be the preferred method. I’ll endeavour to make it as viable as yours.
I can’t tell my boss to fuck off, because that would get me fired. Yet, I can tell my brother to fuck off, and he still hangs out with me. What gives?