Don’t flatter yourself, son, you’re never in the “Category” field.
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I remember, about 25 years ago, in my first IT job, my boss and I used to read everyone’s emails. He was 21, I was 16-17. We’d especially focus on the hot chicks. Got some juicy shit, too. It was my introduction to how to abuse admin privileges.
Then when I was about 18, I got a better paid job, and I left. I still had the admin password, because he was too lazy too change it. About a year later, he realised I was still reading his emails, when he saw the webmail logs. Suddenly wasn’t so funny, then.
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Was it you talking about taking a break from posting or someone else? I read all this shit from posters about how badly they need a break and then next day they are posting like nothing happened. It’s like I’m surrounded by some weird ass forum bots programed to occasionally say human shit between posting sprees to keep humans feeling connected. If Johnny is a bot, you guys put in a lot of work.
It was me because I felt dumb having been duped but then all this shit happened today and made me realize that I’m not going to let a few jerks ruin this place for me. I’m simply going to model the behaviour they claimed they wanted on the forum.
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I want to say one last thing. First off, and most importantly, I want to apologize for breaking the community’s trust. It was wantonly destructive at best. I shouldn’t have done it, and I’m sorry. I had a moment of weakness and caved to pressure. I feel really shitty about it, and that probably won’t change.
So far I have been called deranged, likened to a rapist, and a plethora of other things and motives ascribed to me that I don’t feel is worth hashing out in this post, but suffice it to say I don’t see a place here for me anymore, and I had already been leaning this way for a while.
I want to say that some of you - you know who you are - really should show some fucking compassion and realize there are real people behind these screens and messages. I struggle to post this, because I just know it’ll be twisted somehow, but to say that this forum has had a negative effect on my mental health in the last several months would be the understatement of the century. I should’ve taken better care of it, that was my fault too. Honestly it is a battle I fight daily and lately I lost that battle. I feel betrayed and literally sickened by what I read in that pm thread. If I had known the contents I never would’ve clicked on it. I should not have let trolls and people whose sole intention seems to be causing other’s misery get to me, but I did. This is on me. I pride myself on always leaving places better than when I found them. I understand I am not doing that here, and again, I apologize for that.
I want to state definitively for the final time - I have not read any pm’s other than the ones I publicly stated, nor have I looked at anyone’s personal info or done anything (other than what I did publicly) to violate anyone’s privacy. I have no interest or motive in doing so either. Ggoreo can verify this fact. I do not know how to alter logs, and you cannot do it through the forum software. I do not know if it’s even possible to make database modifications work with this software - if you tried you’d very likely have to know the inner workings of discourse deeply, and be able to make modifications to the database in a way that could likely break the forum. If it sounds like I don’t know what I’m talking about, I don’t, I’m just guessing - and I haven’t tried anyway. It also doesn’t make sense to me to try to claim I altered logs - otherwise why wouldn’t I have attempted to do so the other night? It’s all there, any mod or admin can view it. I’ll leave it up to them if they want to publish that, because I no longer have the permissions.
It’s really important to me that people understand that I have not done anything to break the community’s trust other than what I did the other night.
Now I want to say some nice things. I understand my tone and language has thrown a lot of shit out there, especially with my generous use of the plural “you” - A lot of people have reached out to me to express gratitude privately and I appreciate it beyond measure. I didn’t have time and was too overwhelmed to respond to all of it, but I really appreciate it. I also appreciate the overall support and trust I received from this community (outside of a handful of bad actors). It means a lot to me. I hope I did not disappoint or betray any of you and if this is the case, I don’t know how to make it up to you other than to again say I’m sorry, and if you are ever in my area, I’d be happy to buy you dinner and a drink.
One final lingering thing - there’s someone in this community that owes me a certain sum of money. I’m not gonna out them or chase the debt. I would just really appreciate it if you paid it back when you are able to according to the terms we discussed. I’m saying it here because I won’t be able to read pm’s soon so I don’t know what the point of doing it there would be. I’m not mad, and honestly, if it is a huge burden, just please reach out to me somehow and explain rather than disappearing on me. I don’t even need it, I just feel a little betrayed at this point.
Finally, if anyone sees this as a reason to doxx me or cause me any RL harm I would like to remind everyone that I know exactly who has my personal info and who does not. I will figure out who did it, and if you think I’m angry and crazy/deranged now, it should also occur to you that I take things like that very seriously and will go to great lengths to make sure whoever does something like this faces consequences. However, there’s nothing I’ve really written here or elsewhere I wouldn’t mind the entire world knowing about. If you are thinking of trying something - just know it’ll likely be a waste of time and anger me greatly.
My email is jmakin2p2@gmail.com. You can reach me there or on discord. I’m going to log off now, probably for good. I plan on relocating my blog to its own site, which I have been wanting to do for a while. That’s all I really have left here.
Mods, please ban this account for 1 month, at which point I will likely ask for a perma.
Thanks everyone.
- jmakin
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All the drama here has been pretty aggravating for everyone and hasn’t been good for anyone’s health. I’ve been following a lot of the drama, and I have to say the current train wreck we’re in was inevitable. I kept thinking why won’t anyone stop, they’re just pushing and pushing and at some point this is going to explode. Some people made sincere efforts to help mediate, but it was entirely predictable months ago that none of it was going to work.
The thing with drama is you know you shouldn’t get involved, but then you do it anyhow because jesus some of this shit really pisses you off. It pissed me off and I did it to myself voluntarily while you didn’t have a much of a choice. Now, I never got involved in the drama and I’d like the say the reason is because I’m just a mature person with better self control. But the actual reason is because I don’t want hurt my like per post ratio. I’m not even joking, that is literally the reason why.
I thought about PMing you because I knew about this secret PM thread (even though I wasn’t invited) and was worried you might do something you’d regret. I was pretty pissed off too and thought to myself if I were the admin I might say fuck it and start nuking accounts. But I didn’t PM you because I thought I was overreacting. So it’s disappointing this is how things played out, but hopefully things settle down, maybe this site survives, and after some time people realize they don’t want these grudges to be permanent.
Take care Jmakin. If I ever need to contact you I’ll just PM another poster.
Sorry, I just had to do it 
.
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Do what’s best for yourself, jmakin.
Hopefully this isn’t the last we see of you.
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Done
Looks like you banned him for a day
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Oh lol the options are
so since he asked for a month I selected next month
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I don’t want to temp ban myself. But I will pay $375 to the first poster who catches me posting in any of these threads. My blood pressure can’t take it. That’s literal, not a metaphor. My face is flushed red right now. My blood pressure teeters on needing medication in calm times. It’s like the worst of the doom-scrolling days leading up to the election.
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Just curious about the random sum? 🤷
can i @ you in those threads hoping you’ll forget? I promise to spend it all on overpriced food.
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I was going to unmute one of those threads and @ you offering you $200 to post there, but my empathy prevented me from doing it.
For real, no shame in just muting all the drama threads.
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Wasn’t that also him posting under an alt and not technically suzzer and he still fessed up?
I have them muted, I don’t think I see it. That screenshot if is my muted threads list.
Yeah my point was if you catch me posting as suzzer. Having to post as an alt was enough to slow me way way down, which was good enough. But I didn’t really stipulate that up front.
Regs derailing the temp ban thread (throttle on the other threads leading to spew elsewhere)
vaya con dios mi amigo
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