I have anxiety attacks and yes, I know when they are likely to come. But that’s because certain things trigger them in me, while other things do not. Meeting new people, going to places I haven’t been to before, sometimes just going to a shopping mall can bring them on for me. I don’t get them when I’m by myself at home. Since they are usually (but not always) predictable with me, I take a lorazepam prior to the stressful situation, and that can help. I’ll take two or three if I’m petrified of going somewhere that’s uncomfortable for me.
I know enough about them to know when they’re more likely to happen and I can steel myself against one beforehand.
Doesn’t always work but I’m convinced that it minimizes the impact.
I’m trying to figure out if I’m dealing with what I think might be relatively low-grade anxiety. I’m finding that it’s hard to articulate the symptoms or to self-diagnose online (never a good idea, I realize, but I’m just looking for general guidance).
I had a blood pressure spike a few years ago, and I took some meds for it for a while and gradually brought it under control. I continued to have some feelings of weirdness that I attributed to the HBP, but now I’m wondering if it was unrelated and I was just making assumptions. My BP is mostly normal these days.
But a lot of the time I feel kind of nervous in the pit of my stomach, unable to fully relax, I get sensations of slightly elevated heartrate, and I really can’t concentrate like I used to. Then that lack of being able to concentrate seems to trigger insecurities that I’m dealing with a mental health issue and that further keeps me from relaxing, etc. I tell myself it’s just stress (and it’s true that I do tend to feel it more during the more stressful times in the school year – I’m a teacher), but I also feel pretty happy and I’m confused because I don’t currently really have all that much to be stressed out about. I’m also a total noob to all this so I’m not sure if there’s like a clinical difference between stress and anxiety.
I told my doctor some of this and she basically wants to rule out some more physical things (so I’m due to see a heart specialist, though I’m pretty sure I’m good there), and then I guess next step is a therapist?
I guess I’m just wondering if any of this rings familiar to anyone. Full disclosure: I haven’t read this thread yet.
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This all rings very true to my experiences fwiw. The nervousness/sense of fear in your stomach, especially.
I don’t really have any valuable input on the rest - not sure where you draw the line between being stressed from day to day stuff and having clinical anxiety or whatever, and I haven’t gotten up the nerve/motivation to try going back to a doctor or therapist for it.
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February 2020 I got a xanax prescription during a really hard time – arguably the lowest of my life. I never finished the prescription, as I got really into meditation.
Today is bad. The script is expired, but … I realy want to take one but can’t seem to. It’s not the expiration, but the shame, like this is a failure.
Last night I guess I had the first argument in a new relationship (eight months) … most things have been so smooth and easy, but she has some trauma around exes which previously led to some hard situations. … witout getting deep into a story, I violated her trust in not telling her I went kayaking with a friend previously dated.
I never meant this to be a deception. Certainly it wasn’t any kind of romantic thing, or cheating. They’re a friend, and wanted support going on paddle boarding the 1st time. I’d previously tried to introduce them but it seemed to spark some kind of panic, so yeah, I just … didn’t mention it. My mistake.
Think I’m gonna puke.
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Fwiw, I say take the meds. I know people who use it specifically for high anxiety spikes. There’s nothing shameful about it, no more so than taking tylenol for a headache or rubbing aspercreme into sore muscles. Its medicine. Thats what it is for.
Take one even though its expired.* Then contact your doc and get a refill to have on hand for the tough times. Just my opinion.
- I am not a doctor, this does not constitute medical advice.
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Medication expiration dates aren’t super important.
Xanax is a really shitty anxiety drug though, and they should go to other pathways to manage their anxiety if possible. It’s not like taking a tylenol.
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I didn’t take it and the worst seems to have passed. Thanks for listening and perspctive.
I’ve been talking with a friend about this and I find myself feeling a bit better. Something inside feels a bit quieter, and here’s what I think it is: They keep using the word “mistake,” as in, “you made a mistake.” And that word seems to be counteracting, to some extent, the shame I feel. … perhaps helpful for someone else some day. I know it was a mistake (as opposed to the shame-focused, “I am a mistake”), but there is something about hearing it from someone else that helps it resonate and stick a bit.
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Thanks for the perspective. I did not mean to imply that Xanax and tylenol were the same in their effects or anything of the sort, only that if you have been prescribed a medicine by a doctor, that you should not feel shame in then taking that medicine for its intended use.
Ive recently begun working with this within myself as well.
I for the longest time have beaten myself up internally hard whenever I do something that isnt to my top level, best of my ability, or in general makes me feel stupid or hurts someone else. I internalize and torment myself, cause quite a bit of self harm.
Ive recently taken a step back and explored who I am, examined my motives, and determined that at heart, I am a good person who does try my best to not fuck up, and that, eventually, I will make a mistake and fuck up.
Not because im a bad guy, not because I want to cause myself or anyone else harm or pain, but because I am human, and I am not perfect.
I can hope for it, I can strive for it, and yet inevitably I will make a mistake, and I have to love myself enough to be forgiving when those times occur.
Ive found this easier to do since I have begun practicing breathing and meditating. Yes, I can improve from my mistakes and try hard not to make them again, but beating myself up for them is nothing but self destructive.
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I have spent a lot of time looking at my … you said “motives,” and I think it’s the same thing, or related. Core beliefs? … I see in me a very clear set of core beliefs that were set at a young age and then strengthened through trauma.
In strange shapes and forms, in me I find: I hurt people; I have to be right to exist; make everyone happy, or avoid being thrown out of the group …
Meditation has been a huge help, in seeing this. I am much more attuned to being triggered, and I can see that many times this means that little version of me is now running the show and I am operating on those beliefs.
What I’ve seen, recently, is how destructive this is. That little kid can and does make decisions that most people would label “right” or even “compassionate,” but if the decisions don’t come from the truer, deeper me, they often result in stress regardless of how “right” they may be.
Inspired by the LC thread, I’ve got a different kind of post here: hoping I can get thoughts from any licensed therapists or psychologists on behalf of my therapist girlfriend. She has a master’s in clinical mental health counseling and is a recently-licensed LPC in the state of Virginia. We’d like to move, certainly away from the DC area and preferably out of Virginia entirely.
Reciprocity for LPCs seems… varied, at best. It seems like a common threshold for transferring credentials is Licensed + 2 years, but that obviously varies by state. We’re helped by the fact that Virginia has pretty strict requirements, so she is likely to have met the requirements for every other state. (California is a notably exception and is causing a lot of heartburn because it’s near the top of my list of places to move.)
Have any of you dealt with transferring between states? What about from USA to another country? And are there any online resources you’d recommend? I don’t have a Reddit account but am considering joining r/psychotherapy on her behalf, and would love any non-Reddit communities that might have answers to our questions.
I think the business and management chat thread is the better place to ask for help on this forum, since that’s where people talk about switching jobs.
Yup she does, she just isn’t really interested in doing additional coursework since she recently finished grad school and prefers the states with fewer requirements 
Thanks, NBZ–I figured this thread might have a better chance of catching the eye of other MH professionals.
Haven’t posted in a while and especially not in here, guess it’s ok.
I’m so fucking broken. Last 5 years have been fucking awful. I got 3 burnouts working for big4, taking care of my gf who had split personality. We also had a dog whom I raised completely alone. 2 years ago, I got home from work and she was gone with all her stuff and the dog. That’s cool, fuck her. After that I collapsed completely, didn’t do anything for a year.
Last August I went to 10 week CBT therapy, mon-fri 8-15, it was amazing and I was about to start working part-time for my friends company. The day therapy ended I hurt my back playing disc golf. I couldn’t feel my right hand and leg at all. Hence the strong fentanyl patches for ~3 months. Surgery went fine but the withdrawals lasted for two months.
Last week we went to luxury cottage for my best friends 40th birthday. While installing disco lights I dropped from the ladder. At the time I thought it was nothing, maybe it was the sedatives or fresh air of the countryside.
It turned out to be a broken ACL, third time in my life. I was just getting back to work, dating, charity work and now all that is on hold for a year. This Monday I stood in the handrail of my 6th balcony for a while, I have a noose hanging from the ceiling too, in case of emergency. I’m so fucking tired of being sick and tired.
I have world’s best friends, they would like to help me, if they could. I’ve been to every imaginable therapy and tried every drug there is, legal and illegal. I don’t know if I have any fight left in me. I also don’t know why I wrote this, guess it helps. Kids, don’t be me like me.
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This all sounds incredibly hard and the way you feel right now is totally valid. AND, I can see in your post here that there are good and positive things in your life, people there for you, potential for events to turn … keep posting here! people are here for you.
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Well, this is third rodeo for me, 1 tear in left and now 2 in right knee. Mostly bandwork when at home, looooots and lots of aquajogging and gym. Meniscus tears are painful, I feel you. I guess all my menisci are long gone and vacuumed to menisci heaven.
Body works in mysterious ways and the pain can radiate anywhere. In my case, this February, I thought I was going to shoulder surgery because it was the only place where the pain radiated. Actually it was two collapsed vertebrae near my neck. When I woke up after the surgery everything was 
instantly.
I have hypermobility, double-jointedness w/e. When my leg locks while hyperextended it’s instant snap if I turn.
The thing is I get all of this free if I go the public, maybe 10€ per day spent at hospital. But that takes 6 months and atm I can’t walk at all, I took a 100m taxi to buy some liquor this morning.
Man I’m drunk.
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Don’t give up. Please don’t give up.
I’m 44 and had to start all over from scratch. I deliver packages for Satan. I’m on the edge of quitting lest I go postal since no matter how hard I work or how much Im willing to give of myself its never enough. The algorithms wont even leave the shadow of a penny on the table.
I have a rescue that cant be around other dogs. This limits my ability to go anywhere since I don’t want to leave my best friend any more than I already do the 4 10 hour shifts I work in which I take no breaks and piss in bottles.
I live in a neighborhood where Ive made a sincere effort to be a good neighbor for the first time in my life and its turning into a nightmare. I will most likely have to arm myself which even typing that brings me shame but not near the shame that I will feel with the likely path of action that would result to coming home and finding my record collection and production equipment taken and/or my dog dead.
Suicide isnt an option since I come from a familiy of actual bootstrappers and I wont ruin their lives because of my own inadequacy.
I say all this just so you know there are others in this space who are currently digging their way out of hell.
When Im at my lowest I try to channel the energy of the marginalized that this society was built on and all the people who are struggling to make it. The ones who never blew opportunities and have given their all and still might succumb to a futilous fate.
Remember that form and function reverberate throughout existence and transcend societal constructs and perception so when you fight for yourself you are also fighting for others.
And last but not least: a Saiyan warrior is at their strongest when they rise up from receiving a near to death beating. The closer to death; the higher the aptitude for recovery.
Reach out anytime you need to. You might save my life.
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Thank you, great post 
Intergenerational dadlessness is the root of most of my problems. My dad’s dad died when my dad was 6, he got hit by drunk taxi driver while walking home from theater. My mom’s dad worked as an engineer and wss working abroad ~220 days a year. No emotion at all from my parents. I got molested as a child and I kept it for myself for over 30 years. My parents completely blocked that idea when I told them,shoved it in strongbox and launched it to sun. Gaslighting.
Holy shit what is this nonsense, far beyond drivel. Neverthess, reading what you’ve been through touches me, if I was in your shoes I’d be homeless or dead. I’ve lost the genetic lottery (knees) but I’ve won the lottery that matters: being born on Finland. Mental health services are totally free, after ~600€ drugs are 2,50€ per year. So the help is there, why isn’t it working?
I hope all the best for you, you seem like a tough mf. 
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