Every Episode of Magnum, P.I. (1980-1988) RANKED

Arts & Entertainment
41

What does a typical day look like for you? How much is spent not watching Magnum PI?

42

i’m in covid isolation so it’s like a rare opportunity where nobody can stop me from doing this thing i’ve wanted to do for years

3 Likes
43

when i think of “ultimate freedom”, it’s a very clear picture of me watching every episode of magnum PI in order and ranking them

7 Likes
44

Original Quantum Leap maybe?

45

I can’t argue with that. Vaya con dios, my friend.

46

It’s been while but I remember every single episode as better then the last until I couldn’t take it anymore halfway through the fifth season.

47

s2e26 Wave Goodbye

a beautiful surfer is murdered on the beach near the club, and magnum knew her sortof. so it’s up to him to solve this shit.

after stumbling through actual police investigations, he finds a homeless druggie witness who’s a vietnam vet who’s lost his mind and lives in a campsite in the jungle.

the rookie cop’s name is R. Kelly, and he’s the real killer. big twist! because he was sorta helping magnum along the way. But magnum gets him to confess when his grizzled partner was just within earshot, crouching in a bush or something. and in the 80s in hawaii, cops arrested cops no problem. these days the old cop would probably cover for the rookie’s murder and kill magnum just to tie up the loose end. simpler times…

  1. s2e25 Tropical Madness
  2. s1e3 China Doll
  3. s1e11 The Curse of the King Kamehameha Club
  4. s2e20 Dead Man’s Channel
  5. s2e23,24 Memories are Forever
  6. a1e12 Thicker Than Blood
  7. s2e26 Wave Goodbye
  8. s1e1,2 Don’t Eat the Snow in Hawaii
  9. s1e15 Don’t Say Goodbye
  10. s2e22 From Moscow to Maui
  11. s1e17 J. “Digger” Doyle
  12. s1e9 Missing in Action
  13. s1e14 Adelaide
  14. s1e6 Skin Deep
  15. s1e7 Never Again, Never Again
  16. s1e18 Beauty Knows No Pain
  17. s2e21 Woman on the Beach
  18. s2e19 Billy Joe Bob
  19. s1e16 The Black Orchid
  20. s1e13 All Roads Lead to Floyd
  21. s1e10 Lest We Forget
  22. s1e8 The Ugliest Dog in Hawaii
  23. s1e4 Thank Heaven for Little Girls and Big Ones Too
  24. s1e5 No Need to Know
4 Likes
48

s2e27 Mad Buck Gibson

mad buck is an adrenaline junkie adventure writer, and everyone is super annoyed by his antics immediately.

he reverse-pistoriuses magnum’s bathroom. taking a luxurious bath and firing a .45 pistol at the wall into the bedroom. he says it’s to keep his shooting skills sharp, but when magnum remains angry at him he says it’s a work of art and he’ll agree to sign it. the wall is famous now you’re welcome.

rick and tc both turn out to be huge fans of mad buck, and meeting him briefly ignites each of their passions to write their own novels. aside from this, mad buck spreads chaos and destruction everywhere he goes. he says he came to hawaii so he can hang glide from oahu to maui, 26 miles. it turns out he has terminal bone cancer, and he’s on a suicide mission. and then he does it, magnum doesn’t stop him. kinda sad

  1. s2e25 Tropical Madness
  2. s1e3 China Doll
  3. s1e11 The Curse of the King Kamehameha Club
  4. s2e20 Dead Man’s Channel
  5. s2e23,24 Memories are Forever
  6. a1e12 Thicker Than Blood
  7. s2e26 Wave Goodbye
  8. s1e1,2 Don’t Eat the Snow in Hawaii
  9. s1e15 Don’t Say Goodbye
  10. s2e22 From Moscow to Maui
  11. s1e17 J. “Digger” Doyle
  12. s1e9 Missing in Action
  13. s1e14 Adelaide
  14. s1e6 Skin Deep
  15. s1e7 Never Again, Never Again
  16. s1e18 Beauty Knows No Pain
  17. s2e21 Woman on the Beach
  18. s2e19 Billy Joe Bob
  19. s1e16 The Black Orchid
  20. s1e13 All Roads Lead to Floyd
  21. s2e27 Mad Buck Gibson
  22. s1e10 Lest We Forget
  23. s1e8 The Ugliest Dog in Hawaii
  24. s1e4 Thank Heaven for Little Girls and Big Ones Too
  25. s1e5 No Need to Know
3 Likes
49

Petition to add the ranking out of total episodes so we don’t have to hunt and find where this episode is ranked every time.

Tropical Madness sounds like an awesome episode of television

50

s2e28 The Taking of Dick McWilliams

some local legend rich white guy gets kidnapped, and instead of calling the cops the wife calls magnum. lucky dick, because he kidnapped himself. magnum figures this out shortly before finding dick mcwilliams… DEAD.

magnum finds his accomplice, but he denies any involvement in the death. so he goes to the wife, and she’s about to commit ritual suicide! magnum has to beat up her japanese dad before he can stop her.

i didn’t understand how dick died or why his wife tried to kill herself. magnum writers were going through some shit the last couple episodes. hope they’re okay

  1. s2e25 Tropical Madness
  2. s1e3 China Doll
  3. s1e11 The Curse of the King Kamehameha Club
  4. s2e20 Dead Man’s Channel
  5. s2e23,24 Memories are Forever
  6. a1e12 Thicker Than Blood
  7. s2e26 Wave Goodbye
  8. s1e1,2 Don’t Eat the Snow in Hawaii
  9. s1e15 Don’t Say Goodbye
  10. s2e22 From Moscow to Maui
  11. s1e17 J. “Digger” Doyle
  12. s1e9 Missing in Action
  13. s1e14 Adelaide
  14. s1e6 Skin Deep
  15. s1e7 Never Again, Never Again
  16. s1e18 Beauty Knows No Pain
  17. s2e21 Woman on the Beach
  18. s2e19 Billy Joe Bob
  19. s1e16 The Black Orchid
  20. s1e13 All Roads Lead to Floyd
  21. s2e27 Mad Buck Gibson
  22. s1e10 Lest We Forget
  23. s1e8 The Ugliest Dog in Hawaii
  24. s1e4 Thank Heaven for Little Girls and Big Ones Too
  25. s1e5 No Need to Know
  26. s2e28 The Taking of Dick McWilliams
6 Likes
51

Why did you go from S01E18 straight to S02E19 ???

52

the episodes count up forever, they don’t reset based on a new season. this is how amazon does it and it works great for what i’m doing

53

Interesting!

54

s2e29 The Sixth Position

notable lines:

rick: TC, since when did you become a dance maniac?
TC: aficionado! aficionado! i’ve always loved the ballet!

american spies are sent to kill this prima ballerina in hawaii. magnum saves her life, then tries to find out why. cia jails magnum and a kgb agent threatens the ballerina with a knife to her achilles. magnum scares him off and the ballerina goes into hiding for 6 months. problem solved?

  1. s2e25 Tropical Madness
  2. s1e3 China Doll
  3. s1e11 The Curse of the King Kamehameha Club
  4. s2e20 Dead Man’s Channel
  5. s2e23,24 Memories are Forever
  6. a1e12 Thicker Than Blood
  7. s2e26 Wave Goodbye
  8. s1e1,2 Don’t Eat the Snow in Hawaii
  9. s1e15 Don’t Say Goodbye
  10. s2e22 From Moscow to Maui
  11. s1e17 J. “Digger” Doyle
  12. s1e9 Missing in Action
  13. s1e14 Adelaide
  14. s1e6 Skin Deep
  15. s1e7 Never Again, Never Again
  16. s1e18 Beauty Knows No Pain
  17. s2e21 Woman on the Beach
  18. s2e19 Billy Joe Bob
  19. s1e16 The Black Orchid
  20. s1e13 All Roads Lead to Floyd
  21. s2e29 The Sixth Position
  22. s2e27 Mad Buck Gibson
  23. s1e10 Lest We Forget
  24. s1e8 The Ugliest Dog in Hawaii
  25. s1e4 Thank Heaven for Little Girls and Big Ones Too
  26. s1e5 No Need to Know
  27. s2e28 The Taking of Dick McWilliams
2 Likes
55

s2e30 Ghost Writer

TC is rich after unknowingly smuggling nuclear materials or something for some rich guys. he doesn’t care. he’s spreading cash all over, and taking meetings with higgins to become an investor. higgins works up a deal where tc puts up all the money and higgins gets half the profits. :vince1:

magnum gets a job with this reclusive writer, and in a surreal scene they dress up as surgeons for a fancy dinner on an operating table surrounded by cctv cameras. turns out the reclusive writer is daffy, walking in the room in a tuxedo with no pants and acting like a loon. magnum isn’t convinced he was the real guy.

next thing you know, zeus and apollo are getting knockout-gassed and there’s a sniper shooting at magnum’s sleeping head, barely missing him but through luck! he’s awoken by an unrelated old butler breaking in at the same time as the assassination attempt. it’s a senator’s wife sending an elderly butler to do espionage to steal sexy ancient correspondence from the reclusive author.

this shit gets so convoluted. first they beat up an even elderlier butler, this butler is so frail i can’t believe they kick his ass like this. magnum and the senator’s wife break into the reclusive writer’s penthouse, discover he’s not who he says he is, and get imprisoned in this hospital room with cctv cameras and security all over.

magnum outwits the security cameras because it’s 1981, and they find the real reclusive writer, CRYOGENICLY FROZEN. they don’t unfreeze him. instead, they rescue the body double who doesn’t know where he is or how to speak and he’s so out of it he almost crawls over the edge of the building when they’re up there to get away on the helicopter.

  1. s2e25 Tropical Madness
  2. s1e3 China Doll
  3. s1e11 The Curse of the King Kamehameha Club
  4. s2e20 Dead Man’s Channel
  5. s2e23,24 Memories are Forever
  6. a1e12 Thicker Than Blood
  7. s2e26 Wave Goodbye
  8. s1e1,2 Don’t Eat the Snow in Hawaii
  9. s1e15 Don’t Say Goodbye
  10. s2e22 From Moscow to Maui
  11. s2e30 Ghost Writer
  12. s1e17 J. “Digger” Doyle
  13. s1e9 Missing in Action
  14. s1e14 Adelaide
  15. s1e6 Skin Deep
  16. s1e7 Never Again, Never Again
  17. s1e18 Beauty Knows No Pain
  18. s2e21 Woman on the Beach
  19. s2e19 Billy Joe Bob
  20. s1e16 The Black Orchid
  21. s1e13 All Roads Lead to Floyd
  22. s2e29 The Sixth Position
  23. s2e27 Mad Buck Gibson
  24. s1e10 Lest We Forget
  25. s1e8 The Ugliest Dog in Hawaii
  26. s1e4 Thank Heaven for Little Girls and Big Ones Too
  27. s1e5 No Need to Know
  28. s2e28 The Taking of Dick McWilliams
3 Likes
56

s2e31 The Jororo Kill

something about an assassin tipping off a disabled reporter to his targets. the assassin is a master of disguise AND of disguising his voice to sound exactly like a real nun. but nuns don’t work on sunday! bam! magnum shot the nun on the ladder and it turned out to be the assassin

  1. s2e25 Tropical Madness
  2. s1e3 China Doll
  3. s1e11 The Curse of the King Kamehameha Club
  4. s2e20 Dead Man’s Channel
  5. s2e23,24 Memories are Forever
  6. a1e12 Thicker Than Blood
  7. s2e26 Wave Goodbye
  8. s1e1,2 Don’t Eat the Snow in Hawaii
  9. s1e15 Don’t Say Goodbye
  10. s2e22 From Moscow to Maui
  11. s2e30 Ghost Writer
  12. s1e17 J. “Digger” Doyle
  13. s1e9 Missing in Action
  14. s1e14 Adelaide
  15. s1e6 Skin Deep
  16. s1e7 Never Again, Never Again
  17. s1e18 Beauty Knows No Pain
  18. s2e21 Woman on the Beach
  19. s2e19 Billy Joe Bob
  20. s1e16 The Black Orchid
  21. s2e31 The Jororo Kill
  22. s1e13 All Roads Lead to Floyd
  23. s2e29 The Sixth Position
  24. s2e27 Mad Buck Gibson
  25. s1e10 Lest We Forget
  26. s1e8 The Ugliest Dog in Hawaii
  27. s1e4 Thank Heaven for Little Girls and Big Ones Too
  28. s1e5 No Need to Know
  29. s2e28 The Taking of Dick McWilliams
2 Likes
57

s2e32 Computer Date

higgins has an old flame coming to visit in a week, and magnum agrees to become his personal trainer.

rick is convinced magnum is doing PI business spying on the cheating wife he’s fucking. he punches magnum and kicks him out of the club! magnum already had quit the job, he wasn’t even betraying rick at all. but rick was too heated, he wasn’t listening

notable lines:
higgins: time!
rick: 7 minutes
TC: you run a 7-minute mile?
rick: no, that’s a 7-minute beach

magnum rule #1: embezzlers aren’t killers. you can bet your friend’s life on that

and it turns out the chick higgins was working out to impress, has a hot young boytoy “traveling companion” she jets around the world with. so higgins once again extends his cold streak, fuckin guy never catches a break. this was so unnecessary, to take this from him.

  1. s2e25 Tropical Madness
  2. s1e3 China Doll
  3. s1e11 The Curse of the King Kamehameha Club
  4. s2e20 Dead Man’s Channel
  5. s2e23,24 Memories are Forever
  6. s2e32 Computer Date
  7. a1e12 Thicker Than Blood
  8. s2e26 Wave Goodbye
  9. s1e1,2 Don’t Eat the Snow in Hawaii
  10. s1e15 Don’t Say Goodbye
  11. s2e22 From Moscow to Maui
  12. s2e30 Ghost Writer
  13. s1e17 J. “Digger” Doyle
  14. s1e9 Missing in Action
  15. s1e14 Adelaide
  16. s1e6 Skin Deep
  17. s1e7 Never Again, Never Again
  18. s1e18 Beauty Knows No Pain
  19. s2e21 Woman on the Beach
  20. s2e19 Billy Joe Bob
  21. s1e16 The Black Orchid
  22. s2e31 The Jororo Kill
  23. s1e13 All Roads Lead to Floyd
  24. s2e29 The Sixth Position
  25. s2e27 Mad Buck Gibson
  26. s1e10 Lest We Forget
  27. s1e8 The Ugliest Dog in Hawaii
  28. s1e4 Thank Heaven for Little Girls and Big Ones Too
  29. s1e5 No Need to Know
  30. s2e28 The Taking of Dick McWilliams
3 Likes
58

s2e33 Try To Remember

this one starts out with magnum being attended to by paramedics after crashing the ferrari! and with a title like this you KNOW our boy’s got amnesia

magnum is in the hospital and the doctor is listing all the shit wrong with him, concussion, cracked ribs, bruised tip (he said bruised hip but i thought he meant the tip of magnum’s wang was bruised in the crash)

police found a detroit tigers hat next to a dead body and are FINALLY gonna question magnum. seems like any time someone on hawaii shouts for police they’re there in force in 20 seconds, but it takes 32 episodes for them to interview magnum, a dead body magnet for almost two full seasons.

this is finally some legitimate drama in this show. magnum might be reminded of what happened at any moment, and asian columbo brings him to the murder scene. magnum starts having vietnam flashbacks and the detective is getting suspicious.

higgins again gets to use his real and effective hypnotism skills, this time with a gold medallion instead of a crystal. seems reckless to do this to someone with a concussion but he’s the expert

notable lines:
magnum: “it’s only murder if i don’t give you the antidote”

  1. s2e33 Try To Remember
  2. s2e25 Tropical Madness
  3. s1e3 China Doll
  4. s1e11 The Curse of the King Kamehameha Club
  5. s2e20 Dead Man’s Channel
  6. s2e23,24 Memories are Forever
  7. s2e32 Computer Date
  8. a1e12 Thicker Than Blood
  9. s2e26 Wave Goodbye
  10. s1e1,2 Don’t Eat the Snow in Hawaii
  11. s1e15 Don’t Say Goodbye
  12. s2e22 From Moscow to Maui
  13. s2e30 Ghost Writer
  14. s1e17 J. “Digger” Doyle
  15. s1e9 Missing in Action
  16. s1e14 Adelaide
  17. s1e6 Skin Deep
  18. s1e7 Never Again, Never Again
  19. s1e18 Beauty Knows No Pain
  20. s2e21 Woman on the Beach
  21. s2e19 Billy Joe Bob
  22. s1e16 The Black Orchid
  23. s2e31 The Jororo Kill
  24. s1e13 All Roads Lead to Floyd
  25. s2e29 The Sixth Position
  26. s2e27 Mad Buck Gibson
  27. s1e10 Lest We Forget
  28. s1e8 The Ugliest Dog in Hawaii
  29. s1e4 Thank Heaven for Little Girls and Big Ones Too
  30. s1e5 No Need to Know
  31. s2e28 The Taking of Dick McWilliams
7 Likes
59

Post has strong “why is Cabot Cove so dangerous” vibes.

Awesome thread.

1 Like
60

s2e34 Italian Ice

robin masters sent magnum to do some sterling archer shit, rescuing a beautiful young woman from a mafia compound in sicily. mimi rogers separately shows up as a more age-appropriate love interest for magnum. it’s ironic her character is an acting teacher because she’s maybe the only real actor to appear on the show so far

rick hilariously pretends to be an italian waiter to fool an actual italian. i’m surprised rick would ever agree to work against the mafia.

  1. s2e33 Try To Remember
  2. s2e25 Tropical Madness
  3. s1e3 China Doll
  4. s1e11 The Curse of the King Kamehameha Club
  5. s2e20 Dead Man’s Channel
  6. s2e23,24 Memories are Forever
  7. s2e32 Computer Date
  8. a1e12 Thicker Than Blood
  9. s2e26 Wave Goodbye
  10. s1e1,2 Don’t Eat the Snow in Hawaii
  11. s1e15 Don’t Say Goodbye
  12. s2e22 From Moscow to Maui
  13. s2e30 Ghost Writer
  14. s1e17 J. “Digger” Doyle
  15. s1e9 Missing in Action
  16. s1e14 Adelaide
  17. s1e6 Skin Deep
  18. s2e34 Italian Ice
  19. s1e7 Never Again, Never Again
  20. s1e18 Beauty Knows No Pain
  21. s2e21 Woman on the Beach
  22. s2e19 Billy Joe Bob
  23. s1e16 The Black Orchid
  24. s2e31 The Jororo Kill
  25. s1e13 All Roads Lead to Floyd
  26. s2e29 The Sixth Position
  27. s2e27 Mad Buck Gibson
  28. s1e10 Lest We Forget
  29. s1e8 The Ugliest Dog in Hawaii
  30. s1e4 Thank Heaven for Little Girls and Big Ones Too
  31. s1e5 No Need to Know
  32. s2e28 The Taking of Dick McWilliams
2 Likes