Sorry to hear it. Had both maternal grandparents go to dementia. My uncle (mother’s brother) is showing signs of early-onset dementia. My mother is scared to death of getting it despite showing no signs. It is a truly horrible way to go. If you can be there, get there. Enjoy the good days while you have them.
My mother’s deplorable boyfriend is dealing with a series of health problems. Severe back issues have been a problem but he’s been dealing with recurrent gout for some time. Unless they find something more than that, I’m sure he’ll be around to complain about black people and Mexicans for a while. Old white guys that have money don’t go down easily.
Yeah sometimes it’s hard to tell, she might just be one of those who says the quiet parts quiet.
My wife’s stepdad is a full-on deplorable who we kind of avoid talking to about political stuff, but his big thing seems to be logging onto my MIL’s facebook page to share ridiculously hateful Anti-Obama/Hillary/AOC/whatever memes that people in their 70s find funny, and he’s apparently too dumb/lazy to start his own page.
I do actually believe it’s him who’s doing it since it seems to come in bunches, and basically when he posts something that directly insults a member of the family (like some particularly hateful anti LBGTQ thing) my wife will call up her Mom to tell her, and she’ll be all exasperated and say “that fucking asshole” and delete everything he posted. But still she could change her password at any time and make sure he has no access, but doesn’t do it…big red flag.
Her big thing is “I hate talking politics” to deflect any kind of question about what she believes. But one day in the car with my wife they got on the subject of immigration somehow and let the mask slip when she said “but honey, don’t you think we need a wall to keep them out?” (with that kind of incredulous tone like she couldn’t believe someone would think otherwise, either). I think with a lot of these couples we hold out hope that the quiet one disagrees with the loudmouth, but mostly I think it turns out they just want to keep appearances up.
That’s different, there is no power dynamic with that person and you aren’t related to them, of course I’d take the lunch or ice cream. By taking money from a relative you are essentially their bitch, to put it impolitely. I’m not going to be my relative’s bitch I’m a grown man. Again I know, /r/unpopularopinion
I have exactly the same experience working in people’s homes. When I started I would reflexively turn down everything out of what I thought was politeness. Now I usually accept things realizing that that is what is polite and allowing them to be nice.
Damn, how did that relationship work? I’m guessing you knew her views on things? Did you guys just never talk politics? How long did the relationship last after Trump got elected?
Funny I’ve never felt like a bitch accepting a meal from a friend, family member, or business associate. But you already noted that you’re just weird in this regard, so I won’t belabor the point.
It started in 2015 and ended a few weeks ago. Her views didn’t make sense at all. She was anti gun. Pro LGBTQ+. Pro choice. But for some reason she fell for the whole illegal immigration is out of control bs and that was her single voting issue.
Yeah we mostly didn’t talk politics. Probably why I never pulled the trigger on marriage.
My daughter has been super busy (worked over 40 hours last week at the Gelato shop) and hasn’t painted and glassed my board yet. We might get paint today.
Damn that seems crazy. I couldn’t imagine not talking to my significant other about politics considering its important enough in my life to post on a message board about it.
Regardless, I know how ending a long relationship can be very painful, but it sounds like you definitely dodged a bullet.
In my family, the older people pay for the meals. If I go to dinner with my aunt or uncle, they pay. If I go with my niece or nephew, I pay. Have never thought about turning down a meal over something like political differences. That’s overthinking it IMO.
My daughter has been super busy (worked over 40 hours last week at the Gelato shop) and hasn’t painted and glassed my board yet. We might get paint today.