Next one coming shortly.
That is a helluva quote at the end that will be getting immediate rotation in the Risky household
“It’s got to have sex appeal. And a catchy name.”
"$pringfield, or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Legalized Gambling"
File this one both under “Homer takes on a new career” and “the Simpson family is helpless without Marge.” Although the main reason I picked it is because it’s just jammed with classic bits and lines.
In the midst of an economic downturn, Springfield decides to adopt legalized gambling to drive economic activity. Mr. Burns sees it as a chance to tighten his stranglehold on this dismal town, but pretty quickly devolves into later-years Howard Hughes. Homer gets a job as a dealer, which he’s terrible at (“Uh, let’s see. 18, 27, 35-- dealer bust! Looks like you all win again”). Marge gets addicted to the slots and starts neglecting her home life and responsibilities. Homer, of course, is terrible at said responsibilities, and finally after a couple of failed attempts successfully pulls Marge away. Some highlights:
- The opening filmstrip
- Homer taking Henry Kissinger’s glasses (“No one must know I dropped them in the toilet. Not I, the man who drafted the Paris Peace Accords”)
- “I’ve lived through 12 recessions, 8 panics, and 5 years of McKinleynomics!”
- “Lisa, just because you’re ten feet tall doesn’t mean you can tell me what to do.”
- “At the risk of being unpopular, this reporter places the blame for all this squarely on you, the viewer.”
- Mr. Burns’ flashback to his childhood on the boardwalk (“What was I laughing at? Oh, yes, that crippled Irishman!”)
- The pitches for casinos (especially the Sea Captain)
- “Your lifelong dream was to become a contestant on The Gong Show, and you did it, remember?” “We got more gongs than the breakdancing robot that caught on fire.”
- Otto punching out Gerry Cooney
- Bart starting a treehouse casino
- “I remember that meeting, and I have a photographic memory.”
- Homer arguing with Rain Man
- “We’re required by law to ask every 75 hours. Get her another free drink.”
- “You gotta improvise, Lisa! Cloves, Tom Collins mix, frozen pie crust… There’s no reason to–” CRUNCH “Let’s go see Mom.”
- “I think you may have a problem.” “I won $60 last night!” “Woo-hoo, problem solved!”
- “BOOGEYMAN!? You nail the windows shut, I’ll get the gun!”
- Robert Goulet playing Bart’s casino (“Your manager says for you to shut up!” “Vera said that? Huh.”)
- “Lisa, your mom still loves you. It’s just that she has a career now. She’s a slot jockey.”
- “Oh, it’s always something, isn’t it? First I have to drive your pregnant mother to the hospital, now this!”
- “We’ll take the Spruce Moose! Hop in!” “But, sir–” click “I said hop in.”
- Homer babbling “Homer, what is it? Slow down.” “Yera gedda ferda redda oura.” “Think before you say each word.”
- “You made her cry. Then I cried. Then Maggie laughed. She’s such a trooper.”
- “Maybe I should get some professional help.” “No, no, that’s too expensive! Just don’t do it anymore.”
- “I’m Idaho!”
In conclusion,
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@mjiggy is up
@RiskyFlush you may want to update the spreadsheet not to have jman’s name in it for the second half
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GAMBLOR!
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This was for sure on my list for next pick
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VERA said that?
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haha thanks
also to put my picks in tho!
Only a crazy person would deny your request
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Good pick, I was about to take that this round but couldnt think of a good tie in
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Think I’m getting a lot of value with this pick although upon further review it’s not a great fit with the rest of my theme: season 4 episode 20 Whacking Day.
@Nicholasp27 is up, I’ll find some quotes and trivia in the interim.
Principal Skinner tricks Bart and the bullies into getting locked in the furnace room so they won’t be around for Superintendent Charmers’ visit to the school. However Bart gets free and ends up taking a joyride on Willie’s tractor into Chalmers, which gets him expelled. He then has to be home schooled by Marge, leading to this exchange:
Marge: Bart, I’d like you to read this copy of “Johnny Tremaine.” It’s a book I read as a girl.
Bart : A book!? Pfffft.
Marge : I think you might like this. It’s about a boy who goes to war. His hand is deformed in an accident.
Bart : Deformed? Why didn’t you say so?! They should call this book “Johnny Deformed”!
Meanwhile the whole town is getting ready for their annual May 10 whacking of snakes but of course Lisa is appalled when she finds out. She tries to get the town to stop and eventually Bart discovers that it’s a sham (actually an excuse to beat up the Irish), leading to Barry White singing “Can’t Get Enough of Your Love” to lure the snakes away. Bart gets readmitted to school at which point Skinner realizes he left the bullies locked in the furnace room. He gets them the bikes he promised and then plots to use them to run away with Willie in case the kids are dead.
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I always loved Whacking Day but thought I could steal it later.
I’ll take Bart the Murderer aka Don Bartholemew
Now I owe three writeups, ugh
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@grue is up
I love that “Johnny Deformed” line. Also one of the handful of standout episodes where the first act has little to do with the main plot.
Also Homer pulling into the garage and nearly running over Bart more than once.
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This makes me think of the scene in $pringfield where Burns thinks back to his youth and crippling the Irishman with his bumper car and then laughing about it the entire day.
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Im using mind reading powers to think I will pick this if I dont get sniped in the next three picks
I’ll take S5’s Homer the Vigilante 
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