Goddamn I wondered what the hell this was. It sounded like someone fell on or off my roof. My door rattled. But I knew it wasn’t an earthquake because there was zero ground-shaking.
I imagine some tweaker hiding in his closet right now, thinking someone was trying to break in to his place.
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I really fucking regret going there now. It was my girlfriend’s idea to go. She had brought it up a few times when she was drunk, but I always brushed it off. Now last weekend she brought it up again, sober this time. She wanted to go to a strip club together with me and it had been on her mind for a long time, she said she was super curious. So yesterday we went there together, after lots of talking and making sure she was okay with it. We didn’t have any rules. Anything that happens we would discuss while we were there and we would only do stuff we were both OK with. So we arrive and just chill at the bar for a bit. We watched from a distance. She then asked me if she could buy a dance. I’m cool with this, and we pick out a girl together and she gets a dance. She’s enjoying it, the girl seemed to like it (obviously) and tbh I thought it was really hot. We talk for a while with her until she needs to go on stage. Now my gf says I should get a dance too. I’m hesitant, but asked her if this was okay with her and she assured me she was.
I just sit down and my gf goes looking for a girl and comes back with a pretty brunette (this is relevant). She buys me a dance and I’m sort of enjoying it, still feeling a little bit nervous with my gf around but her eyes were glued at us and she was smiling. Girl puts my hands on her body and I look at my girlfriend and she nods. When it’s finished we start talking again, and the girl asks my name. I tell her and guess what, we used to know each other. She’s the younger sister of an old friend of mine, like 6 years back. I had only seen her a few times at his house and we met briefly. I didn’t recognize her (she used to be blonde) and it never once crossed my mind it could be her. So she’s all excited and whatnot but I see my girlfriend is pissed, so shortly after we got out of there after saying goodbye. As soon as we’re outside she’s mad. I swear I didn’t recognize her but she isn’t buying it and keeps asking about our history. Wants to check my phone, because the girl was too flirty (at a strip club..) and was too comfortable around me and she already felt like something was ‘off’. And she tells me we were playing an act. And when I get home I get a Facebook request from her right when my phone is on the table and this pissed her off even more. She swears me and her knew what was going on, but honestly I didn’t. I can’t speak for the girl ofcourse.
Any ideas on how to fix this.. We’ve been together for almost 2 years and we’re living together. I just ended up sleeping on the couch because else we would be arguing all night. She has brought it up again today and she’s still convinced I’m playing games with her and even said I was already seeing this girl. Honestly I don’t know where to go from here, she refuses to believe me and is convinced she’s right. Thinking of maybe sitting down with the girl and my gf so she can help me out
I do want to add this is completely out of character for her. I’ve never seen her act like this. right now I’m just waiting until she’s home from her mom.
TOP COMMENT
shamewhore
I just think in that moment, it became too real for her. She had a fantasy and that fantasy then actually knew you and friended you on Facebook..,and could now potentially become a reality ie, a threat. Girls are always told “She might be hot, but there’s nothing there” well, with this girl, she was hot AND something WAS there, no matter how small or inconsequential that connection seems to you, it was enough to topple the grip your girlfriend had on the situation. I don’t think your girlfriend is crazy. I think she tried to be a really cool girlfriend but a rogue wave that she never could have predicted threw it all out of wack. Maybe next time go out of town for your strip clubs oh, and definitely don’t pursue a friendship - or anything - with brunette
Update - rareddit Aug 29, 2019 (6 days later)
Yeah so thanks for everyone who weighed in last time. It did help me see things a bit more clearly. After she came back home she was still upset. She didn’t want to talk about it, and obviously I did. And when I tried bringing it up she got mad and at one point literally told me to shut the fuck up. That just kinda hurt tbh, and in return I got annoyed. I told her that we were going to discuss this right now, and she refused. So I just left and went to stay at a friend of mine. And when she found out where I stayed she blew up again because that friend is a girl. I didn’t reply to anything until she said she wanted to talk the next day. So I came back home and she apologized, but it felt super forced and insincere. And still she solely blamed me for the strip club fiasco, saying I should’ve known it was her and that I intentionally didn’t recognize her. Right. Long story short, I broke up with her. There was only drama for the past few days and I was/am sick of it. I’m not about to sleep on the couch for the rest of our lease so we still sleep in the same bed but I don’t care. She has tried to make amends and being all cute and shit but I’m just tired of it. As far as I’m concerned we’re done. She hasn’t seemed to accept this and tried to keep acting like nothing happened and do couple stuff. I don’t really talk to her. Though I think she’s starting to slowly realize it’s over and she’s been crying and apologizing.
I don’t see us getting back together, I’m still blown away by everything that happened. Never seen her act like this in 2 years. Gotta survive one more month here, can’t really crash anywhere for more than a few days, she can be won’t. So that’s it.
Girl dodged a bullet.
Guy dodged a bullet. If it wasn’t the strip club, gf would’ve found other situations where she’s “positive” she knows his thoughts and motives, regardless of the facts. She wanted to play with fire and was surprised that the fire was hot
OTOH, he is a dumbass for staying at a female friend’s apartment.
Maybe they both are too immature to be in relationships.
Out of curiosity, how did you land there?
Dude is clearly upset that she wouldn’t consent to him mansplaining why he was right.
I now remember that they’re both 20 years old. Neither one is fully cooked yet.
I mean. The bolded is obviously the most accurate.
The girl got upset over something silly. If every relationship broke up over one person being unreasonably upset one time, no relationship would last.
Obviously if there’s a consistent pattern, then that’s different, but the guy says it’s out of character.
What are the odds that the OP is an unreliable narrator?
They’re literally both kids playing “grown-up.” I wouldn’t assume either is a reliable narrator or mature enough to have “consistent” patterns.
I guess I’ll back away from saying “he dodged a bullet” and instead opine “they both sound like immature chuckleheads.”
I wish I knew why OP got banned from Reddit.
It’s high. But if you’re going to just play the unreliable narrator card, there is not much point in discussing it. Who knows what the fuck happened?
So, I think any assessment includes an implied, “assuming it went down like that…”
I’m totally with the guy on that one based on his story. She sounds borderline psychotic. But of course her story might be very different.
Breaking off the relationship over any type of difficulty is certainly the Reddit approved way of handling things.
That’s to be assumed on these Reddit posts.
Last week was my first week back at work after taking 12 weeks off for FMLA leave and I woke up on Saturday with COVID. Hooray!
That is a bummer. Curious how you figured out it was COVID - I’m not sure it would even occur to me to test at this point.
I just read this morning a study in the New England Journal of Medicine that found a loss of 3 or more IQ points for each COVID infection. If this holds up all those basement dwelling incels eventually actually will be the smartest people in the world!