In second place and oh so close to that storybook finish is All-In Flynn with
MGMT - Kids
This is really spot on for the kinds of songs I was looking for in this category: something I already know and like and occasionally listen to but maybe doesn’t hold up as well when it’s given the Walrus treatment. Also probably the best example of how badly I screwed up the wording for this category. This song definitely has a sweet and catchy intro and you can hum along to the chorus but I’m not sure I actually like the verses. I’ll probably still listen to this one again so it makes the podium.
Sorry! I’m doing the reveal from work and there are a lot of ebbs and flows. I guess CanadaMatt wants his first place entry revealed so let’s do it:
Chris Stapleton - Either Way
Definitely the best example of the what would’ve wanted to be submitted here: an otherwise pretty mediocre song with a killer chorus that compels you to listen and ends up elevating the whole experience.
And that’s it, that’s the category. Thanks for all the submissions and sorry to everyone who got screwed by not being able to understand simple rules.
I’m not particularly caught up in any results…well aside from beating that cassette mofo…so I just appreciate you working through a challenging reveal. You’re doing a great job and I appreciate having the reveals to look forward to.
Are you listening on laptop speakers or something? The production on this track is bedroom producer garbage tier which is a testament to how good the actual composition is. I mean, the song objectively sucks with the sloppy cut-and-pastes, her terrible breathing technique, harsh transients on the kick, shotgun, and vocal plosives, squashed EQ via some awful software compressor, etc. It’s inarguably a low-quality production. There’s a reason why good producers slave for hours fixing those issues, and despite all of the flaws there’s still enough there to hook you. I’m not saying my pick should have placed higher; I’m saying I don’t think you’re hearing everything in this song if you think it’s the nuts.
M.I.A. said that she recorded her vocals without paying much attention to her singing and finished the song in one take.
The production may suck but the song is awesome to listen to, which is the only thing that matters for my judging. You’re definitely overthinking things here although I do appreciate where you’re coming from.
Standings! It’s going to be a close finish imo. I already know all the songs for round 5 but I’ll make sure to give them a thorough listen in order to get perfect rankings. Not quite sure when the reveal will be but probably not within the next week given the insanity at work.
Technically almost anyone can still win! It all comes down to who has the best taste in modern “pop” music, couldn’t have designed it any better if I tried. I will say I like most to all of the songs that were submitted for this last round.
Alright right who’s ready for Ryan Seacrest’s Rockin’ Round 5 reveal?? After a nationwide vote, here are your top 12 finalists…
Great job everyone, I actually liked pretty much every song submitted here and had fun listening to them a few times each, especially a few I hadn’t heard in a while or forgotten about. Looking forward to getting lambasted for not even having good taste in popular music.
In 12th place and finishing with a total of 26 points is Eyebooger:
Volbeat - Lola Montez
This song is alright, maybe even pretty good, but I cannot get past whatever effect it being used on his voice. Some sort of autotune, I guess, but every time I listen to this song that’s all I hear. This was a tight round so if your song made me cringe a little I had to dock it I actually have no idea how Billboard’s charts work but when I looked this song up apparently it hit number 1, so they’ve got that going for them. I wonder how they’ll feel when they find they got last in this category.
Edit: Apparently it was on the “hot-rock” charts, which I need to be a Billboard pro to access. They value this service at $489 but it’s only $11.95 a month and does not include print issues.
Next up and finishing with 25 points was Chuckleslovakian’s entry:
M83 - Midnight City
This was a smart entry as it’s right in my wheelhouse and certainly adjacent to a lot of music that I like. Unfortunately, I don’t really care for this particular song, as it tends to fade into background noise when I’m listening to it. Props for the sweet sax solo though. I couldn’t find where it finished on the charts but Billboard chose it as one of the 100 songs that defined the decade. Money quote:
“Midnight City” ultimately feels something like a musical equivalent to a Jackson Pollock painting — in theory, throwing layered vocal samples as a substitute for a chorus, a massive wave of synths on top of an underlying melancholic lyric, and well over 60 seconds of blazing horns at a blank canvas shouldn’t work. But when you hear that final explosion of auditory color, it’s nothing short of euphoric — an ethereal feeling that demands both internal and external exploration.
In 10th place for three points in this round and also finishing with 25 points is Seities
Shawn Mendes - Stitches
And so ends the eternal Seities/Cassette battle, pity I couldn’t rig it well enough. Our first mega-hit of the round, this was a number 1 pop song as far as I can tell. I do think it’s sounds like a fairly generic “pop song” but that doesn’t mean it’s all bad as the refrain is pretty catchy. Probably my least favorite video of the round though, wtf is going on here? The first time I heard this song it was actually an acoustic version, which I like quite a bit better. It probably would’ve done alright in the duet round!
