it’s fairly complicated and all intertwined, I have had IBS/Crohn’s for a very long time. I get malnourished quite easily, as I’ve stated before I struggle with what I’ve learned is essentially untreatable chronic depression.
back in feb I had a pretty gnarly series of events happen and got very ill, physically and mentally. my body started shutting down from what was a fucking sinus infection at first. It just wouldnt go away, and the main symptoms had even passed for a while, but weird crap started happening like increasingly confusing memory issues, total lapses, hard to explain stuff, like I’d be forgetting my address and crap.
well i go get a cat scan and it was scary because it lit up and they thought maybe massive meningioma. it wasnt that, the sinus infection had spread throughout my brain (aided by a severe vitamin D3 deficiency) all the way to my brain stem. They gave me the nuclear option antibiotics that are typically used to treat crap like plague and TB, because it’s a little dangerous and can cause nerve damage among a ton of other crap.
Well, that worked fine i think, but I did get nerve damage in random areas in my legs. whatever i’ll live. the hard thing though has been due to my osteoarthritis and some other genetic condition that is requiring me to have a full knee replacement at 33 (still pending, thanks covid) that causes me debilitating pain even on most days, the side effect of this one antibiotic is that it tricks your immune system into attacking joints/tendons sometimes. so now i get a new level of pain that i dont know when it will end that isnt really treatable. i cant and wont take pain meds.
on top of all this, still the severe depression, even moving around most days is very difficult, keeping on weight has been hard, sleep has been rough, this stupid infection even spread into an abscessed tooth and eventually my jaw, which required 10k+ of treatment to correct.
everything’s kinda rough and horrible right now so I am definitely not trying to start crap, believe me, i just found it a bit helpful to post in some pet topics i like, but now it’s clear i cant do that so i will not.