Movies (and occasionally face slaps) (Part 1)

Once again, everyone IGNORES all those European tourists killed by the crazed lone gunmen at the Nakatomi tragedy over 30 years ago.

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I loved Shang-Chi and all of its callbacks to classic martial arts movies up until the CGI dragon battle, which cheapened the whole thing for me.

Ainu Mosir

8/10

A coming of age movie about a teenager in the indigenous Ainu of northern Japan. The did the authenticity thing of casting all non professional Ainu for the actors and it shows as in it works. The performances feel rough in a good way, very much a ‘slice of life’ kind of story. The only downside is that the story doesn’t have too much in it so it moves slowly.

Yeah I liked shang chi fine until the 3rd act when I was like “wait they really just did asian wakanda here?”. Will agree this was the best thing I’ve seen awkwafina do though.

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Never seen Shang-Chi, but is it really better than The Farewell?

By the way, I found myself in Avengers: Endgame. I didn’t see myself originally, but I was talking with someone about the movie last week, so I decided to do some CSI-like slow-mo-enhance and lo and behold (back-right, wearing a suit and holding a briefcase):

Man, look at that acting. The emotion, the gravitas.

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It really does feel like a man watching a supervillain walk through a building.

Oscar worthy imo

It’s too bad they don’t show me seconds later when Tony Stark was having a heart episode on the floor. You would’ve seen my “what’s happening to Mr. Stark?” face.

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Excellent framing, btw.

It’s consistent with that same character being in New York during that Spider-Man movie.

The commute to Stark Tower is a bitch and a half.

Barbecue Man probably keeps his BBQ tongs in his briefcase.

In that scene, I was in a group with three people, crossing in the background. They were personable, we got along well. At one point, a conversation swerved to politics and I casually mentioned that Trump was a piece of shit. The one woman in the group, who again was quite friendly, didn’t say much, but eventually said she was Ted Cruz’s PR or communications manager or some shit. I can’t remember her name, but I do remember doing some cyber stalking later and confirming her story.

I have a decent little cameo in George of the Jungle. I wasn’t even a real extra. They were just filming on my street and asked if I wanted to be in the shot.

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Loved it. Great performances and beautiful.

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I think film historians are going to wonder wtf everyone was thinking with this. Every movie looks terrible now. Last Duel tilted me extra hard because it’s egregious and Ridley Scott ought to know better.

Spiderman: No Way Home

7/10

This could have been terrible, but it wasn’t too bad. It couldn’t really break out of the Marvel mold but it’s one of the better Marvel movies. Zendaya continues to exude charisma without ever smiling. Parker’s friend is really a drag in this movie though. It really felt like they were like ok, let Parker’s friend do his thing for 30 seconds. Ok back to the movie or well we got to let him say his quippy line, ok back to the movie.

Garfield did really well. I never saw any of his Spiderman movies but he did well. Maguire was just weird. Like he had Botox or something. Like half his face didn’t move

Garfield has by far the most charisma of anyone to play Spiderman, but his movies were just bad.

Ugh. Just flipping channels and one of the premiums was just starting Little Women (2019). I made it less than 10 minutes. Very highly reviewed it looks like, but not for me.