I have my next pick ready and am starting the write-up so please don’t snipe me NBZ 
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Thought he was dead.
My desktop just died, so you will have to sit on it a couple of hours.
No worries. Can you PM me your pick so I know whether I need to scrap what I’ve got?
Being the biggest asshole doesn’t just mean being the worst person. Being an asshole means having a certain level of arrogance on top of being a bad person.
This man once went into a meeting with Bill Clinton with disdain for protocol and an intentional avoidance of preparation, leading Clinton to come away with the reaction: “Who the fuck does he think he is? Who’s the fucking superpower here?”
Maybe that arrogance was earned, since he had the power to once again ignore protocol in maneuvering to give a joint address to Congress. Nothing emboldens an asshole like seeing his assholishness rewarded.
He has been accused of quid pro quo. He has cried that it is a witch hunt and an attempted coup when he has been accused of accepting bribes and trading favorable regulations for positive media coverage. He haughtily claims to speak for all Jews, acting with messianic zeal, as if only he truly understands and can fight existential threats, justifying his attempts to cling to power while spectators wail about the death of democracy.
There are worse people out there, but this man seems to prefer confrontation with his enemies in a manner that only an asshole can. The only world leaders who seem to be able to stand him are other assholes, like Trump and Putin. He might even be right some of the time, but he’s still a huge asshole in how he goes about it.
Bibi? I grade him more like F-F. Or should it be F-U?
I choose Benjamin Netanyahu.
Your turn, @hokie
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In the paraphrased words of Bruce Wayne, you either die the hero or live long enough to become a fucking asshole. In the case of my next pick, the world would be a better place today if they had just died the hero.
I will be adding some much-needed diversity to this draft by taking the first brown person, first woman, and first second Nobel Peace Prize winner (wait, what?). Team Hokie selects Aung San Suu Kyi, the current State Counsellor (aka prime minister) of the Republic of the Union of Myanmar.
Suu Kyi’s early life and political involvement make her later heel turn all the more perplexing, so I’ll cover things briefly. She was born in 1945 and had a diverse upbringing, earning multiple advanced degrees from Western schools and living in New York and London before returning to Burma in 1988 to lead the pro-democracy movement.
A military junta, which had seized power in 1988, called a general election in 1990. Suu Kyi’s National League for Democracy (NLD) received 59% of the votes, which would have put her in position to be Prime Minister. Instead, the results were nullified and the military refused to hand over power, placing her under house arrest. She championed non-violence as protest and was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize in 1991 for her efforts.
She spent 15 years of a 21-year period under house arrest and survived multiple attacks / assassination attempts. She received the Congressional Gold Medal from President Bush in 2008 while imprisoned. Her house arrest was lifted in 2010 when the country’s military made an arrangement with the opposition, resulting in the first election in over two decades in 2015. In this election, Suu Kyi’s party won power and she became State Counsellor, equivalent to a Prime Minister–remember, this is through an arrangement with the military.
Her ascendency from hero to pure fucking asshole did not take very long once she had acquired power. Since 2016 she has silently ignored (or, more accurately, encouraged) one of the worst ongoing humanitarian crises in the world: the Rohingya Genocide.
The total Rohingyan Muslim population of Myanmar is was over 1 million people, primarily in Rakhine State, where they’ve been present since potentially as far back as the 15th century. Despite this, they’ve been denied citizenship from predominantly-Buddhist Myanmar and have suffered human rights violations for decades. This violence has escalated since 2016 with support of the Burmese military, and the implicit support of our asshole Suu Kyi.
In 2018, a study estimated that more than 24,000 Rohingya had been killed in the preceding 12 months alone. Many died while being burned alive in their homes as entire villages were razed. Additionally, the study estimated that over 100,000 Rohingya had been beaten, 36,000 thrown into fires, and 18,000 women and girls raped at the hands of the military and the local militias.
Did our champion of peace and democracy do anything? No. To cover this up, Suu Kyi’s government has destroyed evidence, such as flattening burnt villages and mass graves, and has cracked down on the media. In 2017, two Reuters journalists were jailed by the police and were held for almost 18 months despite international outcry. Suu Kyi herself has largely ignored the genocide and humanitarian crisis her government has created, using positively Trumpian logic along the way:
- she stated tensions were due to a “climate of fear” because global Muslim power is perceived as “very great”
- she falsely claims that violence is happening on both sides
- she asked the US Ambassador not to use the word Rohingya because they “are not recognized as among the 135 official ethnic groups” of Myanmar
Groups around the world have revoked awards previously bestowed on Suu Kyi, though as of this writing she still holds her Nobel Peace Prize.
Current team:
- Steve Bannon, destroying democracy and installing alt-right regimes worldwide
- Aung San Suu Kyi, overseer of ethnic cleansing, genocide, a crackdown on journalism, and an all-around humanitarian crisis
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Kissinger, tho
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Holy shit you’re right, that’s embarrassing for me the Nobel Prize committee.
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| Player | Round 1 | Rounder 2 | Round 3 | Round 4 | Round 5 |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| superbooger | Trump | Undrafted | Undrafted | Undrafted | Undrafted |
| chuckles | Moscow Mitch | Undrafted | Undrafted | Undrafted | Undrafted |
| Matt | Sean Hannity | Undrafted | Undrafted | Undrafted | Undrafted |
| zikzak | Richard Sackler | Undrafted | Undrafted | Undrafted | Undrafted |
| hokie | Steve Bannon | Aung San Suu Kyi | Undrafted | Undrafted | Undrafted |
| NotBruceZ | Ronald Ernest Paul | Benjamin Netanyahu | Undrafted | Undrafted | Undrafted |
| LFS | Dick Cheney | Rush Limbaugh | Undrafted | Undrafted | Undrafted |
| TimBuktuuf | Goatse | Sepp Blatter | Undrafted | Undrafted | Undrafted |
| TrueNorth32 | Rupert Murdoch | Charles Koch | Undrafted | Undrafted | Undrafted |
| Riverman | Henry Kissinger | Vladimir Putin | Undrafted | Undrafted | Undrafted |
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I’m going to take a different track for this pick because y’all are leaving some obvious value on the table by drafting people nearing the end of their careers. I’m taking a rookie this round, somebody who’s just getting started and has many years of assholery left to give.
Again, the obvious start to becoming a world-class asshole is to have an asshole parent, especially an extremely wealthy and powerful one who hands you the keys to everything. Sure, some start with nothing and bootstrap their way down to scumbaggery, but so many more are just born into the lowest depths of nepotism.
My draftee got his start at the incredibly young age of 24, being handed a powerful position by daddy that he could not possibly have been qualified for. From there he quickly worked his way up the ranks, aided in no small part by some convenient deaths. Before he had even reached 30 he had achieved an unbelievable degree of power for somebody so young, and he began to wield it on the global stage.
His first big move was dramatic escalation of a regional conflict that is still going and has caused at least 100,000 deaths so far. This was done without a good plan or coordination, and chaos has become one hallmark of the conflict. He then, of course, denied all responsibility for the mess he created.
After washing his hands of that clusterfuck, my draftee dove into his organization’s internecine battles with a scorched earth approach that would have shamed Sun Tzu. When the dust had finally settled, hundreds of billions of dollars had been seized and his position had only strengthened, all of it allegedly done to combat corruption (lol).
As the world increasingly turned to right wing nationalism and populism, my draftee was happily marching alongside, with an approach that was extreme even by the new standards. He continued to amass more and more authoritarian control along the way, and human rights were trampled even further.
There is so much more to write about this precocious young chap, but this is already getting long so let’s skip to the best bit (so far! He’s young!).
A couple years ago my boy just said fuck it and went full Ramsay Bolton. He was so upset by the mean words a portly old gentleman wrote about him and his family that he had the guy straight up slaughtered and dismembere by a fucking gang of 15 people. On video. And they took the dude’s fingers back to my draftee as a trophy. That’s some hardcore shit.
If you hadn’t guessed previously, by now you know I’m talking about the assassination of Jamal Khashoggi and that I’m drafting Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman. Thirty four years young, and devilishly handsome to boot. What an asshole.
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MBS and Netanyahu were both top 5 on my non-American assholes list.
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Time to break up this sausage fest.
Fuck Marsha Blackburn. With a rusty fucking spork.
There are a lot of terrible US states. There are a lot of terrible US senators. Blackburn might be the worst combination of both.
I think I could have taken her later down the line, but we need some female representation here and I was going to take her anyway.
Marsha Blackburn is a stain on a state that COULD be doing better without her terrible, shitty influence.
She hates women, she hates technology, she genuinely seems to hate people in general. She wants nothing more than division and chaos, and she supports the main man full throatedly.
Fuck you, lady.
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| Player | Round 1 | Rounder 2 | Round 3 | Round 4 | Round 5 |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| superbooger | Trump | Undrafted | Undrafted | Undrafted | Undrafted |
| chuckles | Moscow Mitch | Undrafted | Undrafted | Undrafted | Undrafted |
| Matt | Sean Hannity | Marsha Blackburn | Undrafted | Undrafted | Undrafted |
| zikzak | Richard Sackler | Mohammed bin Salman | Undrafted | Undrafted | Undrafted |
| hokie | Steve Bannon | Aung San Suu Kyi | Undrafted | Undrafted | Undrafted |
| NotBruceZ | Ronald Ernest Paul | Benjamin Netanyahu | Undrafted | Undrafted | Undrafted |
| LFS | Dick Cheney | Rush Limbaugh | Undrafted | Undrafted | Undrafted |
| TimBuktuuf | Goatse | Sepp Blatter | Undrafted | Undrafted | Undrafted |
| TrueNorth32 | Rupert Murdoch | Charles Koch | Undrafted | Undrafted | Undrafted |
| Riverman | Henry Kissinger | Vladimir Putin | Undrafted | Undrafted | Undrafted |
Republicans just can’t fucking handle when they lose. After 12 years with the presidency they finally lost it in 1992. So this is when assholes gotta asshole. In comes the Contract with America pushed by this asshole
Round 2 Pick 19
Newt Gingrich
I’m just going to copy and paste from wiki here
A number of scholars have credited Gingrich with playing a key role in undermining democratic norms in the United States, and hastening political polarization and partisan prejudice.[7][8][9][52][53][54][55][56][10][57][58] According to Harvard University political scientists Daniel Ziblatt and Steven Levitsky, Gingrich’s speakership had a profound and lasting impact on American politics and health of American democracy. They argue that Gingrich instilled a “combative” approach in the Republican Party, where hateful language and hyper-partisanship became commonplace, and where democratic norms were abandoned. Gingrich frequently questioned the patriotism of Democrats, called them corrupt, compared them to fascists, and accused them of wanting to destroy the United States. Gingrich furthermore oversaw several major government shutdowns.[59][60][61][53]
University of Maryland political scientist Lilliana Mason uses Gingrich’s instructions to Republicans to use words such as “betray, bizarre, decay, destroy, devour, greed, lie, pathetic, radical, selfish, shame, sick, steal, and traitors” about Democrats as an example of a breach in social norms and exacerbation of partisan prejudice.[7] Gingrich is a key figure in the 2017 book The Polarizers by Colgate University political scientist Sam Rosenfeld about the American political system’s shift to polarization and gridlock.[8] Rosenfeld describes Gingrich as follows, “For Gingrich, responsible party principles were paramount… From the outset, he viewed the congressional minority party’s role in terms akin to those found in parliamentary systems, prioritizing drawing stark programmatic contrasts over engaging the majority party as junior participants in governance.”[8]
Boston College political scientist David Hopkins writes that Gingrich helped to nationalize American politics in a way where Democratic politicians on the state and local level were increasingly tied to the national Democratic party and President Clinton. Hopkins notes that Gingrich’s view[58]
directly contradicted the conventional wisdom of politics… that parties in a two-party system achieve increasing electoral success as they move closer to the ideological center… Gingrich and his allies believed that an organized effort to intensify the ideological contrast between the congressional parties would allow the Republicans to make electoral inroads in the South. They worked energetically to tie individual Democratic incumbents to the party’s more liberal national leadership while simultaneously raising highly charged cultural issues in Congress, such as proposed constitutional amendments to allow prayer in public schools and to ban the burning of the American flag, on which conservative positions were widely popular – especially among southern voters.
Gingrich’s view was however vindicated with the Republican Party’s success in the 1994 U.S. midterm elections, sometimes referred to as the “Gingrich Revolution.”[58] Hopkins writes, “More than any speaker before or since, Gingrich had become both the strategic architect and public face of his party.”[58] One consequence of the increasing nationalization of politics was that moderate Republican incumbents in blue states were left more vulnerable to electoral defeat.[58]
According to University of Texas political scientist Sean M. Theriault, Gingrich had a profound influence on other Republican lawmakers, in particular those who served with him in the House, as they adopted his obstructionist tactics.[9] A 2011 study by Theriault and Duke University political scientist David W. Rohde in the Journal of Politics found that “almost the entire growth in Senate party polarization since the early 1970s can be accounted for by Republican senators who previously served in the House after 1978” when Gingrich was first elected to the House.[62]
Gingrich consolidated power in the Speaker’s office.[57] Gingrich elevated junior and more ideologically extreme House members to powerful committees, such as the Appropriations Committee, which over time led to the obliteration of internal norms in the committees.[55][63] Term limits were also imposed on committee chairs, which prevented Republican chairs from developing a power base separate from the Republican Party.[63] As a result, the power of Gingrich was strengthened and there was an increase in conformity among Republican congresspeople.[64]
Just fuck this guy. Now he is on going on news networks spreading bullshit like this
Writing books like this
Hey look another asshole who is on his third wife.
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NEWT. Elite value at this stage.
Can’t forget that he cheated on his wife while she was dying of cancer.
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This a world leader who is popular in his country among rich people, older people, males, whites and the Christian right. He is pro-life, pro-gun, anti-establishment, anti-gay, anti-immigration, anti-environment, pro-torture, pro-death penalty, and anti-woman. He loves the flag and law and order. He’s on wife #3 (what is it with these guys?).
He picked his vice president despite not really knowing him much at all, after many other people had rejected his offer. He once said “I cheat on my taxes as much as possible. If I don’t need to pay anything, I don’t pay.”
No, we’re not taking Trump again. He’s not a literal Trump clone, but he might as well be. Superbooger’s next selection is the so-called “Trump of the tropics”: Jair Bolsonaro
As a nice sampling of Bolsonaro’s assholishness, I’ll highlight Bolsonaro’s positions on two issue’s that have far reaching implications, not only for Brazil, but for the entire planet.
First, the current COVID-19 epidemic:
He first described it as a “little cold” and accused the media and his opponents of creating false panic, saying that the illness is a momentary nuisance. His solutions are so bad, that an Atlantic article from two days ago stated that “Compared with Bolsonaro’s position on the coronavirus pandemic, Donald Trump’s approach looks sober and scientifically grounded”. Even if that is hyperbole, that’s fucking terrifying.
His ideas for tackling the problem go no further than self-isolation for the elderly and those with underlying health conditions. That’s it. He is furious with the local governments of Brazil’s larger cities that have sensibly introduced much more stringent measures. He states that “Brazil cannot stop” for fear of hurting its economy.
“People are going to die, I’m sorry,” he said. “But we can’t stop a car factory because there are traffic accidents.”
He’s ignoring the problem despite the fact that so many people around him (including high ranking members of his cabinet) have contracted the virus. He says he’s taken the test and it was negative, but as with Trump, you can’t trust anything he says. His response has been a refusal to self-isolate, continuing to shake hands, and posting videos of himself with crowds of his supporters in various places around Brasilia.
Secondly, his record on the environment just 15 months into his presidency is downright appalling:
Under his watch, deforestation of the Amazon rainforest has exploded. Rather than recognize the problem and look for solutions, or even calling it “fake news”, he has CELEBRATED this, saying late last year, “Deforestation and fires will never end. It’s cultural." This isn’t entirely unexpected; part of his campaign platform was to open the rainforest up to more logging, mining, oil exploration and agriculture.
The Amazon was ravaged by fires between June and October last year, and many of those fires were intentionally set by farmers looking for more agricultural land. Because of his gutting of environmental protection offices in the federal government, this may turn into a yearly occurrence.
With the Amazon being the world’s largest CO2 sink, the effects of this rapid escalation of deforestation may be completely fucked due to Bolsonaro’s policies.
And I haven’t even gotten into his treatment of indigenous people or his family’s corruption and ties to paramilitary gangs.
So yeah, a major fucking asshole. And he still has 33 months left in his term.
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