A Walrus for lovers of tight seals (and music) REVEAL

Sports & Other Games
89

6th place (3 points)
@pyatnitski
Moon River – Breakfast at Tiffany’s – Henry Mancini

Hol up. “Moon River” is in sixth place? Do I not know that it won an Academy Award for Best Original Song? That it was selected as the fourth most memorable song in Hollywood history?

And listen, let me take you back in time to what it was like when the song first came out. Most people experienced this song for the first time not as some big choral arrangement, but as a lilting sonnet sung by Audrey Hepburn herself. The song was written for her limited vocal range based on what she’d sung in 1957’s Funny Face, and yeah, you can tell she’s not a great singer, but that voice, that soul, she is the essence of a great performance. We are Paul stumbling upon her on the fire escape and instantly falling in love with her.

But it’s near the end of the list because I just don’t like it all that much. Because despite everything I just said, the song doesn’t do it for me. I’m sorry, Aubrey! I still love you!

2 Likes
90

5th place (4 points)
@jwax13
Radiohead - Exit Music (For A Film) – OK Computer

Submitting Radiohead is almost cheating!!! Revolutionary artists writing revolutionary music. The music, Thom Yorke’s voice, the lyrics, everything about the song is as much a religious experience as Clint Mansell’s score for The Fountain.

The track was written for the Baz Luhrmann remake of Romeo & Juliet as, you guessed it, the outro music for the movie. It’s a slow, somber piece to perfectly punctuate the one time the movie slows down to dwell in sudden grief.

We’re far enough beyond when this song or movie was released—more than that, well beyond Radiohead’s heyday—that younger audiences might recognize the track from its instrumental arrangement on the soundtrack to HBO’s Westworld.

3 Likes
91

4th place (5 points)
@skydiver8
Donnie Darko: The Killing Moon – Echo and the Bunnymen

Goddamn Richard Kelly, wtf happened? Donnie Darko announced Richard Kelly as a wunderkind, but he went the same way as Josh Trank and Jon Heder. Except Jon Heder appears to be a decent guy and quite talented.

I don’t understand what happened with Richard Kelly. This was a great movie. I was looking forward to anything Richard Kelly did next. And then he came out with a director’s cut that ruined the movie. It’s one of the only times you should stick with the studio cut. Part of the fun in this movie is how much fun it is despite nothing making any gdamn sense, but the director’s cut makes it very clear what’s happening, why it’s happening, ugh.

And perhaps its greatest sin is replacing the intro song! The original cut has The Killing Moon by Echo and the Bunnymen, but the director’s cut has Never Tear Us Apart by INXS playing instead. He moves the Bunnymen to later, so it’s not a true betrayal, but he used to open the movie with it.

Then he went on to make Southland Tales, which is a natural progression if it turns out you enjoy the DD director’s cut. It is bonkers and features bonkers performances from The Rock, Justin Timberlake, Sean William Scott, Sarah Michelle Gellar, and Mandy Moore.

Jason Solomons, in The Observer (UK), said that “Southland Tales was so bad it made me wonder if [Kelly] had ever met a human being” and that ten minutes of the “sprawling, plotless, post-apocalyptic farrago” gave him the “sinking feeling that this may be one of the worst films ever presented in [Cannes] competition.”

OUCH!

Anyway, isn’t this a great song? It’s a classic of the 80s and perfectly suited to Donnie Darko, no matter which cut you watch.

5 Likes
93

IT IS TIME FOR THE PODIUM

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94

3rd place (6 points)
@seities
Dangerous Minds: Gangsta’s Paradise - Coolio

It’s hard to believe there was a time when Coolio wasn’t seen as an absurd buffoon, but I swear, there was a brief time in the 90s where he was pretty fucking cool! The trailer for Dangerous Minds is like a shorter version of this music video, and both give you a glimpse into how moving the film was for audiences at the time.

And let’s be clear. Coolio might come off as buffoonish, but he’s a true gentleman. When “Gangsta’s Paradise” won Best Rap Video at the MTV Music Awards, he graciously accepted the award but later said in a press conference that he believed Bone Thugs n’ Harmony should have won for “Tha Crossroads.” And to his point, that was a dope song.

“Gangsta’s Paradise” has been endlessly covered and parodied (including once by accident when it was disastrously attached to the first trailer for the Sonic the Hedgehog live-action movie), but my favorite is Postermodern Jukebox’s jazz cover of the tune. It’s just so…wtf? I can’t help but love it.

That makes seities our 3rd place Polar Bear.

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3 Likes
95

All those Westworld covers are wonderful

1 Like
96

Agree! Ramin Djawadi is fantastic. Black Hole Sun ftw.

1 Like
97

I wanted to submit Light of the Seven for the last category, but it’s TV.

1 Like
98

2nd place (7 points)
@cassette
Townes Van Zandt “Waitin´ Around to Die” Heartworn Highways

This is a gorgeous song with a simple yet haunting performance.

To the uninitiated, folk music might seem like a contained genre of music, but it is as many and varied and splendid as anything else. Just a few of the greats are presented in the documentary that features this very song. The genre contains the folksy sadness that embodies old world Americana, the international flavor of Allison Kraus as she searches far and wide for culturally preserved folk songs that have never been recorded, or my favorite folk band of all time, First Aid Kit.

For me, “Waitin’ Around to Die” and “The Lion’s Roar” from First Aid Kit have to be listened to together. I won’t get into any of the songwriting tidbits that link the song on a theory level beyond saying that much. What I want you to listen to is the energy curve of the music and the vocal melody. Let it grab you and you will hear the similarities.

For me, “Waitin’ Around to Die” is the dark night of the soul we’ve all found ourselves in when we get a hard reality check. Our decisions have led us to a fate worse than we could have imagined. And yet we don’t lay down. We don’t die. We find a lion’s roar (now is when you listen to the second track!).

What’s salvation without someone to be saved from? “Waitin’ Around to Die” might seem like pure despair, but it’s the darkness that shakes our mortal coils. Like the ending of one of my favorite TV shows says, the knowledge that our existence will end is what gives the mere chance to live a value in itself.

As a bonus, check out First Aid Kit’s other track “Emmylou.” Along with being a great folk song, the lyrics show just how much the two sisters that make up the group love the folk singers who paved the genre’s way, name checking greats like Emmylou Harris, Gram Parsons, and June Tabor.

cassette wins our 2nd Place Penguin.

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3 Likes
99

THAT BRINGS US TO OUR WALRUS

1st place (8 points)
@SwankyWilder
“Knockin’ On Heaven’s Door” (Bob Dylan) – Pat Garrett and Billy the Kid

You’ve heard the song, you’ve sung it at karaoke, you’re probably listening to it right now, but have you seen the movie it was written for?

Pat Garrett and Billy the Kid was supposed to be Sam Peckinpah’s masterful follow-up to The Wild Bunch, but when the budget, the schedule, and Peckinpah’s drinking got out of control, the studio took it away from him.

The one shining spot of the film that no one could disagree with was “Knockin’ on Heaven’s Door” written by Bob Dylan just for this movie. I don’t know that I have anything more to say about the song that hasn’t been said before. It is one of Dylan’s finest songs, and it is perfectly paired in the scene below.

What should rightfully make anyone LOL was Peckinpah’s decision not to include the song on his later Preview Cut. Before the studio got a hold of the film, Peckinpah had screened a “preview” cut for no less than Martin Scorcese, who said the film was Sam’s greatest movie since The Wild Bunch. Mission accomplished! But he was one of the only people to see that version until it was finally released years and years later.

Perhaps Martin could have told Sam WTF WHY WOULD YOU TAKE OUT KNOCKIN’ ON HEAVEN’S DOOR?!

But he did. Legendary singer/actor Kris Kristofferson played the role of Billy the Kid, and he later said in an interview that Peckinpah felt like the studio had pushed Bob Dylan on him.

PUSHED BOB DYLAN ON HIM?

I have no idea what Peckinpah was thinking, but he remained committed and didn’t use the song in his recut edition. Ah, well, no one is perfect. No song, either, except maybe this one.

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3 Likes
100

Great reveal! I’m currently pretending to poop at a BBQ so I’ll have to get around to these tomorrow. Some real gems for sure!

3 Likes
101

The Walrus - Increasing the instances of fake BBQ dumps since 2020.

4 Likes
102

Bears Beats BBQ

103

A couple of my personal favorites for songs written for movies

1 Like
104
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105

Sha Na Na, baby!

host, you derailed on this one, goofball

when Danny and Sandy escape the clutches of the vile temptress Cha Cha Digregorio! and shuffle across the dance floor to safety as the crooner hits that high falsetto, life is never grander.

1 Like
106

On the one hand Knockin’ on Heaven’s door is great, on the other I promised myself that if you did Moon River dirty I would periodically spam the thread with different versions (all great) from then on. So, here’s REM, and let’s hope you learn quickly.

4 Likes
107
1 Like
108

Why am I challenging?

Why do people get competitive with the things they do?

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109

Not competitive, just concerned about error in the world.

2 Likes