Well, the 2024 election season is just around the corner, and talk is heating up about the Republican contenders. Let’s see who’s likely to run. The likely theme with all Republican candidates is that they’re going to try to tap into a the sort of conservative populism that Trump did in his 2016 campaign: immigration, trade, and depending on how frisky the candidate is feeling, reigning in Big Tech. Some might also have some America-first isolationist takes, we will see. Given the charisma of the likely field it will test the question, what was Trump’s appeal, his policy positions or his personality? Because I think you’ll see Republicans copying his policy rather than his personality. Because copying his personality will be impossible.
Retreads from 2016:
This guy might have won the nomination had Trump not ran. I think he understood to a certain extent the profound dissatisfaction that Republican voters had for the Jebian Republican establishment and was trying to bridge the gap between the respectable republican establishment and the type of populism that Trump tapped into.
Pros: Smart, powerful new beard, data driven
Cons: not capable of smiling convincingly, is Ted Cruz
Pros: Handsome, Latino, ran a 4.7 40, owned Alex Jones
Cons: neocon through and through despite his occasional populist noises. His immigration positions might hurt him. Don’t know what those positions are but I remember him trying to backtrack in the 2016 primary.
No one else from 2016 seems likely to make any noise in the primary, but who knows.
Two senators that seem likely to run are Josh Hawley and Tom Cotton.
Senator from Missouri. Thinks that the future of the Republican party is the working class.
Well, maybe. Main policy ideas seem to be tough on China, which could have a hook for protecting working class manufacturing jobs. And then reigning in Big Tech, but other than that just standard Republican stuff. Can you sell yourself as a working class party without a coherent health care plan? I doubt it but who knows.
Pros: taking lead in tough on China and big tech, Yale and Stanford grad
Cons: Yale and Stanford grad, not clear anyone cares about China or big tech
Seems to be a Josh Hawley clone except he looks weirder, has a slightly more prestigious education and was in the Army. Very similar political positions to Hawley as far as I can tell. Was a legit combat veteran unlike another GOP veteran, Mayor Pete. Infantry officer and got a bronze star.
Pro: same as Hawley, also a troop. Quite tall.
Con: same as Hawley except looks weirder
Lady GOP division:
Don’t know anything about her except she’s kind of hot and fought the coronavirus by ignoring it and getting everyone in her state infected.
Pros: takes a photogenic gun picture
Cons: none really
Then you’ve got the GOP folks who will try to re-Jebify the party. Nikki Haley, Mike Pompeo. I guess Mike Pence kind of fits in here? If the establishment tries to rise again I think it might be through one of these Trump-connected establishment guys. Hell, maybe you’ll even see Lindsey Graham run again. Can’t wait. Can’t be bothered to search for pictures of any of these clowns.
And then, of course, the Trump family. Many people are saying that Ivanka is next in line, but come on, she doesn’t want anything to do with this shitshow. If a Trump offspring runs it’s going to be
Pros: published author, very strong new beard, smarter than Eric
Cons: dumber than Barron, possible daddy issues
And finally, one last contender
Pros: some experience in position
Cons: jesus christ