Before Swanky has time to change his mind again I’m calling it. We are 13.
This is the OFFICIAL CATEGORIES POST
It would behoove you to read through the thread as there’s a few more tidbits from some submitters, but these are the main points. (If anyone thinks I’ve left off anything UTTERLY CRUCIAL then shout.)
Category host name: Pauwl
Category: Old Music (to be kind to millennials, I’ll set it to older than 1990).
Musical tastes: I don’t like 80’s hair metal or hard rock. I like new wave, no wave, dark wave, proto-punk and other weird 70’s/80’s music. Older than that is wide open genre wise. Psychedelic, folk, soul, country blues, ragtime, gospel. Even old school country.
Any other judging notes: Overly familiar songs will be downgraded in ranking. Don’t enter hits by Zeppelin or classic rock standards. Try to pick a song that it’s unlikely I’ve heard a lot. Older is better. Musical tastes were not in order of preference, just listing genres from the 80’s on backwards.
Category host name: meb
Category: A song performed by someone who is more famous for something other than their music
Musical tastes: Likes: BANGERS, Pop Music, Indie Rock, Folk Rock, EDM
Dislikes: Country music, Radiohead, Songs with no lyrics
Any other judging notes: Must be an original song to that performer (no covers), anything from a musical live, animated, or filmed is ineligible, and if I have to put in deep research to figure out why the performer is famous your entry will be downgraded.
Category host name: NotBruceZ
Category: A cover of a song originally by the Beatles or originally by one of their members solo or a cover by the Beatles or one of their members solo of a song not originally by the Beatles
Musical tastes: Very eclectic. See the Unstuck playlist thread. The major sub-genres I am least likely to listen to are probably metal and hardcore/gangster rap.
Any other judging notes: LOL if you pick a cover of a song that the Beatles recorded but was not originally by them
Category host name: smrk4
Category: A song about a historical event. Allowing a fair bit of latitude about what counts as a historical event i.e. it doesn’t have to be like a jazz flute sonata about the Treaty of Westphalia. Please identify the historical event in your submission; if you have a history take to go with it that’s encouraged but not at all required.
Musical tastes: I like metal (but not the screamy stuff), most rock, some blues, some pop. Also into a lot of new-age electronic stuff, but not dance music per se. Neutral on punk and hip hop. Country is generally a no go, although with this category I can’t rule it out. I don’t like huddle around the campfire folky stuff, sorry.
Any other judging notes: I will try to be open to submissions I don’t necessarily love but that have musical merit (as I understand it). Won’t be too harsh on popular songs if the historical connection is good, but stay away from lol obvious choices as I already have a few songs in mind that are going to be instant nodiums.
Category host name: seities
Category: To fit the current moment, give me a song that in some way references, or evokes feelings of “change”. The song itself can change, the lyrics can discuss change, the artist or song can have the word change in the title, etc. If you are still stuck after that go for anything that references seasons.
Musical tastes: I think I am leaning a bit more towards Rock/Pop/Rap/Metal at this moment in time, but I do have a pretty eclectic playlist in general. I’d avoid anything slow or soft.
Any other judging notes: If it’s overly familiar, there will be a penalty. Don’t submit Tupac - Changes or John Mayer - Waiting on the world to change. Try and keep it under 8 minutes.
Category Host Name: CanadaMatt3004
Category: Song with the best use of the word “Fuck.” I think we have all been there. A song is either really racing along or not hooking us just the right way, and then the word fuck is uttered, sung, screamed or shouted and its just perfect. Thats what Im looking for. The word elevating the song in some way.
Musical Tastes: Generally 90’s-current rock or metal, though I appreciate my share of hip hop and r&B. Country is generally against my tastes but I do appreciate the right kind of country song, and in this category Im curious how it would shake out. Similar for other more mellow types of musical styles/genres.
Category host name: Yuv
Category: Crime. A song about crime, criminals, police, law, etc.
Musical tastes: Learned my lesson - NO symphonic metal. No MRI machines. I will not be able to appreciate if the instruments are tuned in a specific way that is aligned with icelandic humpback whales.
Category host name: pyatnitski
Category: Long songs / pieces. Don’t mind how you interpret it. E.g. A long pop song might be 4 minutes, but that’s pretty short for a jazz workout. But, you people do you.
Musical tastes: Folk, jazz, instrumental rock, doom, noise, bleeps/bloops, ‘world’. I’ll give anything a listen once. I used to listen to loads of weirder indie stuff, but hardly ever do now. I love some classic rock/metal/pop, but am very ignorant about lots of that thanks to a youth spent as a music snob. I really hate popular indie rock, so probably best to avoid triggering me there.
Any other judging notes: I’d like to say no hard length limit and use your noggin, but someone (NBZ) will probably send me a four hour piece because they can. So, I will set the limit at 23m23s. You have been warned! Also if I know something I’ll probably undervalue it, that’s inevitable.
Category host name: eyebooger
Category: Grab bag of a grab bag. Give me a song that fits any two of the following criteria (your choice):
- Has the majority of lyrics in a Romance language that isn’t Spanish
- Was released in 2018 or later
- Is from a group with at least 2 female members
- Has a number in the title
- Is between 3:50 and 4:10 in length
Musical tastes: Modern rock of just about any type and catchy pop, though I can appreciate just about all kinds except country.
Any other judging notes: Don’t really want anything super-familiar. I’ve judged two categories on here so far. One of them recently won the giant walrus bracket, and the other made the quarterfinals. So something that appeals to the masses will probably appeal to me.
Category Host Name: swankywilder
Category: A song where you remember vividly where you first heard it. This can be something like the first song you ever really remember liking, a song that introduced you to a new style or an unfamiler artist or just a song that identifies an occasion or a moment in time. Feel free to interpret as liberally or as truthfully as you like
Musical Tastes: Pop, Reggae, Hiphop, dance, new wave, post punk, pre punk, only things i don;t really go for are Jazz and Metal, and I am willing to be convinced on those
Category Host Name: Nicholasp27
Category: stripped down songs (singer and maybe 1-2 instruments; no electronic stuff over it); mostly a good vocal song with instruments in the background, if anything.
Musical Tastes: Prefer good female voices in general but love tons of male artists. A male singer song that sounds like Hero of War from Rise Against or Snuff by Slipknot or Journeyman by Iron Maiden or lots of Aaron Lewis stuff is great; or anything by Serj from System of a Down. Hero of War won this category over a female song when I used it on another site.
Symphonic Metal, Alternative Rock, 80s/90s Rap+Eminem, 80s love songs and powerful female singers like Heart, lots of Classic Rock, and singer songwriters like Cat Stevens, Jason Mraz, Passenger and then stuff like Mumford and Of Monsters and Men and Lumineers.
Category host name: Louis Cyphre
Category: Broaden my horizon. Introduce me to artists I don’t know, new genres or subgenres, basically anything that is new/unfamiliar in some fashion. So stay away from what we typically get in the charts or hear on the radio. If I can immediately think of dozens of songs just like it this will probably negatively affect your ranking. No need to go overboard: The song will be judged by how much I like it, not by how obscure or exotic it is.
Musical tastes: I mainly listen to rock and metal (from vanilla to extreme) and their siblings, cousins and bastards. I also listen to pop, hip-hop, some classic, a tiny bit of opera and I can generally find something I like in most genres.
Basically no-hoper genres: hardcore techno/gabber, Operetta
Dubious genres: Electronic (although some electronic music did well in the previous categories I judged), Jazz, country/western, disco, RNB, Soul
I listen to a lot of stuff, so just about everything else is in with a shot.
Any other judging notes:There are two rules that if broken will lead to a low score.
- The song should not annoy me.
- The song should not bore me.
Warning: This time I will judge very well-known songs much more harshly.
Category host name: Skydiver8
Category: A song with lyrics so poetic, you wouldn’t be laughed off stage at your local poetry slam if you just read them with no music.
Musical tastes: No mumble rap. No screamy metal. Honestly, I spend most of the time listening to those songs wondering about the long-term damage the poor “singer” is doing to their voice. Anything that might chart on a current country top 100 is not my jam, either. Finally, as we learned last time, weepy college coffee shop open mic “folk” music is definitely not for me, either. Basically anything else is fine.
Any other judging notes: If the lyrics are unintelligible, I’ll probably downvote it (hence the no mumble rap or screamy metal caveats above). Though I do like him, Bob Dylan would probably not score as highly, just because it would make me think you copped out. If it’s literally a poem that someone set to music, that’s fine. Folk is in quotes above because I don’t consider traditional folk like Peter, Paul, and Mary or Arlo Guthrie to be in the same league as this new coffee shop stuff.
Poetry, like any art form, is highly subjective, of course, but let’s be honest, some songs have song lyrics, and some are poetry set to music, and I suspect y’all know the difference. So let’s do it.
