Covering the President: The Trials and Tribulations of Daniel Dale, Esq. (Assisted by Aaron Rupar)

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LOL did this dude really just say ā€œThe LORD and the Founding Fathers created Executive Orders?ā€

Thatā€™s hilarious. And awesome. "And God passed an Executive Order that said, Let there be light: and there was light.

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Leadership!

WAAF

Theyā€™re basically taking the right line here. ā€œWeā€™re glad he agrees with our plan, but we donā€™t think he can administer it without Congress. We wish him the best of luck, and by the way $400/wk is not enough. Anyway, the president says he can fix this alone, so letā€™s see what happens.ā€

Thatā€™s gotta be the message. You canā€™t sue to take away benefits from working class Americans during a crisis < 100 days out from an election. You might as well run on Biden 2020: We ARE The Enemy of the People.

They should probably sue over the payroll tax thing, because of the impact on Social Security and Medicare, but theyā€™ll probably loseā€¦ and if they do, every Republican president from now until the end of time will cut payroll taxes to $0 to sink Social Security and Medicare. So maybe itā€™s best not to sue and to hope the GOP thinks itā€™s unconstitutional and doesnā€™t try it again, I donā€™t know. Thatā€™s a tough one.

But at any rate, all that matters from here on out is winning the election. You canā€™t be suing to block aid from people. He owns it, let him fuck it all up himself.

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Listen here, dork, you can read all you want, but stop being such a nerd, ok? Real men donā€™t read boring executive orders, we speak with our mouths. It does what it says it does and it does what it doesnā€™t say it does and I need to hurry up and wrap this up so I can get over to Bedminster to give das fuh, uh, I mean the president his 2pm fellatio. He hates it when Iā€™m late.

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And if thereā€™s one thing we can be sure of itā€™s that heā€™s going to fuck it up. The no eviction moratorium combined with having no plausible way to pay out the added unemployment benefits (which he cut anyway so itā€™s guaranteed to be massively unpopular even if it went perfectly) make this whole situation an ideal opportunity for the real world to beat Donald Trumpā€™s ass again for being such a moron.

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